I also had my tubes tied stupidly and I can relate to all of what you are saying. While I am not remarried and got them tied in my early 30s, I still know all too well the regret and the anger that comes with a decision that cannot be reversed that turned out to not be the right one in the first place. In a nutshell - :grr:
Unfortunately I was on the wrong side of the stats with IVF. We did 3 cycles and 2 frozen transfers, one with 4 embryos that were day 5, but only a chemical pregnancy throughout the whole process. We did switch clinics for the last cycle too. There was nothing ever diagnosed as being “wrong” with either one of us, I think we just were unlucky. Not really sure. I was told I was in perfect shape, had the two successful pregnancies, great test results, should have been a snap! Who knows? There could be some secondary infertility going on with one of us and we might have had issues if we were trying for #3 and I never had the TL in the first place? My OB always reminds me that 50% of couples who are unsuccessful with IVF have “unexplained” as their diagnosis. It is true that you/we are in a great place having proven our fertility, so go with that, believe it will happen, and go for it! Don’t worry about what might or might not happen, it won’t change the outcome anyway.
I wish you the best!