4 years and counting...


#1

I am new here… I found this site in hopes of connecting with people that understand.

I do have two children from a previous relationship (their dad passed away) - and have been trying with my current partner for over 4 years.

In 2008 we had a 6 month long pregnancy that ended in our son passing away due to a birth defect. Go figure. A baby we tried for and wanted sooo badly. I am still working through that and was lucky enough to spend his 2 hours of life on Earth with him, have pictures of him, but not him.

We have been trying again for over 2 years. In which time, we have tried timed intercourse through a clinic, also rounds of clomid, and femara, HCG triggers, had a HSG ultrasound, IUI with sperm wash - then were told that DH had a varicoceole (after I went to the dr saying I would like info on tying my tubes to avoid this anguish every month of nothing).

He had the repair surgery in March, and still nothing.

It is even harder today because, of course, here I am Day One. I was also told that I had Insulin Resistance and took Metformin, but stopped a few weeks before my last ultrasound, which showed no cysts (done in August 2010).

Sometimes, I want to give up. Nobody understands. They think something is wrong with us - because we had a son that died, we cannot get pregnant, I cannot handle being around pregnant people. It hurts!

Enough for now, I suppose. Thanks for reading.


#2

[quote=jcam2010]I am new here… I found this site in hopes of connecting with people that understand.

I do have two children from a previous relationship (their dad passed away) - and have been trying with my current partner for over 4 years.

In 2008 we had a 6 month long pregnancy that ended in our son passing away due to a birth defect. Go figure. A baby we tried for and wanted sooo badly. I am still working through that and was lucky enough to spend his 2 hours of life on Earth with him, have pictures of him, but not him.

We have been trying again for over 2 years. In which time, we have tried timed intercourse through a clinic, also rounds of clomid, and femara, HCG triggers, had a HSG ultrasound, IUI with sperm wash - then were told that DH had a varicoceole (after I went to the dr saying I would like info on tying my tubes to avoid this anguish every month of nothing).

He had the repair surgery in March, and still nothing.

It is even harder today because, of course, here I am Day One. I was also told that I had Insulin Resistance and took Metformin, but stopped a few weeks before my last ultrasound, which showed no cysts (done in August 2010).

Sometimes, I want to give up. Nobody understands. They think something is wrong with us - because we had a son that died, we cannot get pregnant, I cannot handle being around pregnant people. It hurts!

Enough for now, I suppose. Thanks for reading.[/quote]

I just happend onto your thread. Sorry this response is so long after you posted … if you are still around, have some hope.

My husband and I had a son in 2004, but he was born too early and didn’t survive birth. We’ve been trying since then for another one, with no luck until just now. Now I’m about 7 weeks pregnant with an IVF baby.

It is a hard, scary, painful road, and sometimes well-meaning family and friends make really stupid comments that are way more hurtful than they meant. Those you have to chalk up to them just not knowing how hard it is.

I’d suggest finding a really good RE and educating yourself like crazy, Spend a LOT of time on these boards and read about what other people did. I thought I was read up and educated, but I will tell you, we wasted a LOT of time (Years!) on things that were not at all effective, and that we would have had a better chance on if we’d known more. I also would not have jumped so fast to IVF if I’d known what I know now (although that did end up being what worked for us).

There is a really, really good chance for you still. You just need somoen clinical on your side helping you figure out your options and you have to be the very best advocate for yourself that you can be. It’s possible!!


#3

I have to admit, I was giving up hope that anybody would reply - LOL. I am very happy that you finally have your rainbow baby! I would do the IVF in a second, if it wouldn’t cost me my house, car or right arm. Unfortunately, there is no regulation on the pricing, and no coverage for assisting us though we have a documented infertility - because it is a male infertility issue. If it were me that had issues, then I could have options financially.

We did try the artifical insemination, which I feel we wasted time and money on because my DH needed the surgery.

I have spent so much time researching and reading, just no luck. I used to know exactly what cycle day it was, when I ovulated and when my period would come, to the second. Now, I just feel like getting my tubes tied to avoid disappointment.

My sister being 12 weeks pregnant doesn’t help because she tried for 6 mos. and thought it was the end of the world. Well. :af:

I am sorry to hear about your loss… It is so darn hard because it wasn’t somebody my family saw, touched, kissed - but I did. I miss my son every moment, but I have to be strong to go on. I live my worst nightmare everyday but it makes me a stronger person now.

I wish you tons of luck with this new lil’ one, and hope you will keep in touch.