A Sign?


#1

Hi Ladies,
I just recently found this site and I’m so thankful. There is a wealth of information here and a great deal of warm and caring support.
It seems like my heart aches more and more each day. I keep reminding myself that while a baby is my deep desire, God is all I truly need and I can’t let my wants make me forget that. I’ve been very confused about where He wants me to go with this. Do I look at medicating to cause ovulation just like any other non-functioning bodily process or is it over-stepping and not trusting in God’s timing? This is the question I’ve struggled with. I’ve never been one to pray for “a sign.” I guess I’ve felt like I shouldn’t. Recently, though, that exact phrase slipped out in my prayer: “God, give me a sign. Let me know somehow if I’m doing the right thing or not. Do You want me to adopt, to live childless, to devote my life to my students? Or am I on the right track with this medicine?”
Well, my husband and I are pretty decent budgeters. We handle money together and are working to build a good emergency fund. One of the elements of my confusion had to do with the cost of treatment. My OBGYN (who I hope to be trading in soon for a RE) told me insurance wouldn’t pay for anything and his office quoted me self-pay rates. This time, though, he sent me down the street to the hospital to have my US done (to check for cysts, follicle size, etc.). Because it was done in a hospital setting, it was three times the cost of what I paid in the OB’s office!:grr: That didn’t count the bill they told me I would get from the radiologist who read it before sending it over to the OB. I was very frustrated. I’ve had to call multiple times a day to get any answers from my OB and by the time I knew the cost of this, they had left the office. So, because of this and several other communication issues, I decided to call my insurance company, personally, and ask if anything with a RE or diagnosis was covered. Just for kicks, I also asked about US used to monitor with Clomid. Guess what?! Diagnostic testing, including US, are covered at 100%!:clap: I can’t believe I didn’t call the insurance myself in the first place, rather than just trusting the doctor, who didn’t even try to run it through. So, I called the hospital and they refunded my card and are running it through insurance! That’s almost $400 back in my bank account plus whatever the radiologist bill would have been. Thank you, God!
Is it scripturally sound to ask God for an earthly sign? Because I really feel like He sent me one. Am I way off track, here?

What are your thoughts?

Thank you!


#2

Here are some of my personal thoughts on some of what you said…I do look at treatments for infertility as fixing a medical issue. I do not believe that doing treatments is my way of saying I don’t trust in the Lord. I truly believe the Lord is a part of this from beginning to end. He ultimately decides wether or not the embryo placed inside my body will be a child or not. I also believe you wouldn’t walk around half blind if you could see 20/20 with glasses.

This also reminds me of a story I’ve heard many times before (this is not verbatium). A man is at his home with it begins to rain. The town is being evacuated and a bus comes by and offers him a ride, he says, “No I know the lord will help me” Then the waters rise and he’s there a boat comes by to help, and he says, “No the Lord will help me” Then the man is sitting on his roof and a helicopter comes by offering help, again he says “No the Lord will help me” Well the man drowns and he meets the Lord in heaven. He asks, “God why didn’t you help me?” The Lord says, “I sent you a bus, a boat and an helicopter what more did you want me to do?” So back to taking meds…

I don’t believe it’s wrong to ask for a sign, but I also know that we don’t always get what we want. It’s very important that we continue to pray and realize the Lord sometimes answers our prayers in various ways with the answer sometimes coming when we least expect it. I do think it’s great that your insurance is paying for what your OB “thought” they would not.

I hope all is going well with you! And I wish you well on this journey!


#3

[QUOTE=holdingmybreath] A man is at his home with it begins to rain. The town is being evacuated and a bus comes by and offers him a ride, he says, “No I know the lord will help me” Then the waters rise and he’s there a boat comes by to help, and he says, “No the Lord will help me” Then the man is sitting on his roof and a helicopter comes by offering help, again he says “No the Lord will help me” Well the man drowns and he meets the Lord in heaven. He asks, “God why didn’t you help me?” The Lord says, “I sent you a bus, a boat and an helicopter what more did you want me to do?” So back to taking meds…
[/QUOTE]

I love this!! I am going to tell myself this story when I (continue) to stress over this!!


#4

Here is my story, as it pertains to your question. My 1st IVF, I was very naive, hardly stressed, and everything worked. I saw so many signs along the way that I was positive it was meant to be. When I had my miscarriage at 8 weeks, it was a shock to say the least. How could this be? Everything fell into place. My mother who lives 22 hours away gave me trigger shot, etc.
Months later, I was ready for IVF #2. My ER was going to fall on my B-day, which is leap year and only comes once every 4 years. The due date would have been my mother’s B-day in Nov. Again, I thought these were major signs. The cycle was cancelled for NO response. 2 more cycles have been cancelled since then; the most recent would have had my ET on the due date of the baby I lost. Again, I thought this was a sign. :frowning:
Now, I am waiting to start once again, but this time, I am liberated. I am enjoying life, seeing the beauty in my life with my husband, our house, my job, my family. I am in a better place mentally. I have learned that I will never understand God’s plan, and the more I try to control the outcome, the more God teaches me that it is out of my hands. Looking for signs was actually me doubting him, and wanting affirmation. Go after your dream, roll with it, don’t look for signs, and what is to be will be, and you will be happier along the way. Best of Luck.


#5

I totally understand where yall are talking about looking for a sign. Got a BFN this morning from our 2nd iui. Hubby doesn’t go to church with me, and honestly doesn’t have the faith that I say I do. I keep praying that our little miracle would happen and hubbys heart be changed. It’s really rough keeping the faith, especially when each Sunday another friend is oops, pregnant, and at least one old lady asks if I’m pregnant, I’m overweight, or when I’m gonna have kids. So speaking of signs, I’ve been feeling like I’m a little overwhelmed with the iui part of thread, and even injectables section. I feel like the emotional state Im in gets worse sometimes because of what I read on here. So I thought about you girls, the fertility and faith crew this morning in church, and I felt like that was my sign. I look forward to learning from yall. Thanks for listening!


#6

[quote=babyprayers2011]Hi Ladies,
I just recently found this site and I’m so thankful. There is a wealth of information here and a great deal of warm and caring support.
It seems like my heart aches more and more each day. I keep reminding myself that while a baby is my deep desire, God is all I truly need and I can’t let my wants make me forget that. I’ve been very confused about where He wants me to go with this. Do I look at medicating to cause ovulation just like any other non-functioning bodily process or is it over-stepping and not trusting in God’s timing? This is the question I’ve struggled with. I’ve never been one to pray for “a sign.” I guess I’ve felt like I shouldn’t. Recently, though, that exact phrase slipped out in my prayer: "God, give me a sign. Let me know somehow if I’m doing the right thing or not. Do You want me to adopt, to live childless, to devote my life to my students? Or am I on the right track with this medicine?"
Well, my husband and I are pretty decent budgeters. We handle money together and are working to build a good emergency fund. One of the elements of my confusion had to do with the cost of treatment. My OBGYN (who I hope to be trading in soon for a RE) told me insurance wouldn’t pay for anything and his office quoted me self-pay rates. This time, though, he sent me down the street to the hospital to have my US done (to check for cysts, follicle size, etc.). Because it was done in a hospital setting, it was three times the cost of what I paid in the OB’s office!:grr: That didn’t count the bill they told me I would get from the radiologist who read it before sending it over to the OB. I was very frustrated. I’ve had to call multiple times a day to get any answers from my OB and by the time I knew the cost of this, they had left the office. So, because of this and several other communication issues, I decided to call my insurance company, personally, and ask if anything with a RE or diagnosis was covered. Just for kicks, I also asked about US used to monitor with Clomid. Guess what?! Diagnostic testing, including US, are covered at 100%!:clap: I can’t believe I didn’t call the insurance myself in the first place, rather than just trusting the doctor, who didn’t even try to run it through. So, I called the hospital and they refunded my card and are running it through insurance! That’s almost $400 back in my bank account plus whatever the radiologist bill would have been. Thank you, God!
Is it scripturally sound to ask God for an earthly sign? Because I really feel like He sent me one. Am I way off track, here?

What are your thoughts?

Thank you![/quote]

Just be careful. Radiologic studies are covered for me under many circumstance BUT not for fertility treatments (unless it is required for an initial diagnosis). I would double check again. Just incase.


#7

It’s common to look for signs in situations such as this - whether you believe in God or not. It’s perfectly natural… but don’t forget to educate yourself, be your own best advocate, and use this time of difficulty, not necessarily as a sign or a message from a higher power, but as Life, and an opportunity to grow as a person, and learn to overcome and persevere in times of strife.

Good luck and peace to you… and follow your dreams! No one and nothing wants anything else for you.


#8

A little something I remind myself when I question if its Gods plan for me to struggle with infertility, especially when so many people try to make me feel guilty about conception through artificial means…as the insurance people call it. God gave doctors and scientists the gift of technology and medicine in order to help people like me. :slight_smile:


#9

great way to think of it


#10

[QUOTE=holdingmybreath]Here are some of my personal thoughts on some of what you said…I do look at treatments for infertility as fixing a medical issue. I do not believe that doing treatments is my way of saying I don’t trust in the Lord. I truly believe the Lord is a part of this from beginning to end. He ultimately decides wether or not the embryo placed inside my body will be a child or not. I also believe you wouldn’t walk around half blind if you could see 20/20 with glasses.

This also reminds me of a story I’ve heard many times before (this is not verbatium). A man is at his home with it begins to rain. The town is being evacuated and a bus comes by and offers him a ride, he says, “No I know the lord will help me” Then the waters rise and he’s there a boat comes by to help, and he says, “No the Lord will help me” Then the man is sitting on his roof and a helicopter comes by offering help, again he says “No the Lord will help me” Well the man drowns and he meets the Lord in heaven. He asks, “God why didn’t you help me?” The Lord says, “I sent you a bus, a boat and an helicopter what more did you want me to do?” So back to taking meds…

I don’t believe it’s wrong to ask for a sign, but I also know that we don’t always get what we want. It’s very important that we continue to pray and realize the Lord sometimes answers our prayers in various ways with the answer sometimes coming when we least expect it. I do think it’s great that your insurance is paying for what your OB “thought” they would not.

I hope all is going well with you! And I wish you well on this journey![/QUOTE]

Wow!! This really helped me! I’ve struggled with this and i couldn’t have read this at a better time as I am scheduled for IUI after church today. This puts it in a clear perspective for me. Thank you!