Ahem...."Pelvic Rest" Poll....!


Ok ladies…

My RE has me on complete “pelvic rest” (meaning no sex/no orgasm) until further notice. I am 32, MF fertility issues, no history of m/c, and have had two great BETAs. He says we can talk about it at first u/s. I don’t understand this rule…some websites say orgasm is good for the bloodflow…obviously regular pregnancies do not have this restriction…and from what google and I can tell, REs can be pretty mixed in this department.

My friend did IVF last year, had a previous m/c, and her RE did not give her these restrictions. (She successfully delivered in December!)

Sooo…wondering who out there has (or has had) the same instructions…and whose RE’s have lighter restrictions?


We always had the same rule and for some reason the 6 weeks ended up turning into longer each time!! In the end it really screwed with our sex life, we almost got too used to not being able to have sex. We always followed all restrictions…too afraid of “what ifs”.

But I know there are many people out there that don’t! Congrats on your betas :slight_smile:


We don’t have that restriction after being pregnant however I am doing endometrian suppositories so its kinds messy and we refrain during the 2ww. If my re tells me to not do something- I’m going to listen only cuz I don’t want to wonder what if if something where to happen…even if it had nothing to do with the sex- I’d always wonder. With my daughter I was spotting early on which then lead to pelvic/ bed rest? Did u ask ur re why?


my RE said no organsm/sex til the heartbeat is heard (so like 6 1/2wks)
At 6wk and 3 days we heard the heartbeat but I still waitied till almost 10wks!
I just kept thinking if anything went wrong, I didnt wanna second guess my choice to have sex. I know its crazy but after spending out of pocket 15k on IVF and meds alone, plus all of our IUIs, I wasnt gonna chance it!
I now have a healthy 2 1/2 month miracle falling asleep in her daddys arms


Thx for the input Ladies! :slight_smile:

My clinic issues this restriction to all clients as a blanket restriction - no specific reason for me. I asked my RE about it and he said better safe than sorry.

It just would be so much easier to accept if there was definitive research or if all RE’s gave this advice…instead of some yes, some no.

Either way…we are obviously thrilled for the :bfp: and will hang in there!!! Thx for the discussion!


I’m on pelvic rest too per my doctor. I’ve had two HCGs with appropriate increase and I’m scheduled for my first U/S on 4/16/13.


My RE requires pelvic rest until the heartbeat is heard, this includes no orgasms! Unfortunately, night 3 after my FET I had an orgasm in my sleep, it happens regularly to me and there iis nothing I can do to prevent it! I am in my 2ww still, but am getting :bfp: on hpts.

Is it necessary? Maybe or maybe not, but I think the doctors just err on the side of caution with respect to pelvic rest.


I’m in my fourth cycle of IVF/FET. Every time, my RE has said pelvic rest until the beta (assuming it’s a strong positive). In cycles where I had a low beta, that rest continued until the pregnancy ended, just in case. In this cycle, finally I have good strong betas and was actually not advised about orgasm or sex going forward. I assume, based on past cycles that orgasm is ok post-beta in this case.

I also tend to O in my sleep from crazy sex dreams about every other day. This didn’t happen to me in past cycles - probably a result of the much higher hormones in what seems to be so far a healthy pregnancy. It’s unfortunate that doctors seem to not get how common this is and that “pelvic rest” isn’t entirely under our control.

I agree that given that doctors’ recommendations in this area vary SO widely, there is not much science involved in this decision (aside from specific individual circumstances where pelvic rest may be more clearly indicated). I have a couple of competing theories about the various recommendations. If anyone’s curious about this stuff…

Theory #1 is that doctors really want to be helpful, as much as possible. That goes double when a patient has had one or more miscarriages. Miscarriage is in many ways very mysterious, however, and both doctor and patient have little control in the matter. In an effort to offer as much sense of control as possible, doctors begin to think, “well, maybe abstaining from sex/orgasm might help.”

Theory #2 is that the “mother/whore” dichotomy is alive and well in our culture. If you google widely for women’s opinions about sex after IVF, you’re sure to find a number of posts I’ve found overtly offensive, implying that women who want a baby so badly as to go through IVF really have no right to consider something as base as masturbation or sex. Doctors, being people raised in the same culture as the rest of us, are not immune to this bias, even if it’s in a less overt form.

Given that most docs give the ok to orgasm and/or sex after a healthy beta, I think you’d be safe with masturbation at least as there is no risk of infection there.