Chance now gone for a biological sibling for my son - need advice/support


First of all, thank you to everyone who has been so kind posting on my threads. It has helped so much. I’m currently going through a miscarriage - just stopped my PIO shots so the doctor feels in the next few days it will naturally happen.

This was my 2nd IVF round with the last of my donor sperm - trust me, I’ve hunted down every possibility and there is no more. So it feels like this is the end.

I just can’t afford another round of ivf right now but I don’t want to wait because I’m 39. My cycles on all the medication have been awful and i actually think my follicles grow better without drugs.

I’ve been very up and down and of course, my initial thoughts are - I just want to keep trying, I don’t care about the biological aspect anymore. But perhaps I’m being too emotional.

My partner isn’t keen on a new donor and is very concerned with all our costs. We’ve already spent $28,000. So I have to think about our relationship and my family.

Part of me now wants to do the least evasive thing to my body and try IUI on a natural cycle…but…but…

I know I need to go to counselling to sort all this out - day by day…perhaps I’ll revisit this post 4 weeks from now and think differently.


I just said this on another thread, but I’ll say it again–there are therapists who specialize in infertility, and if yours doesn’t, I’d recommend looking for one who does! I found it incredibly helpful. I think what you’re talking about is exactly the kind of thing that an infertility specialist would be able to help you sort out. You’re facing a big, hard decision, where both opposing options are really understandable. I hope you do get a chance to talk to someone about it, and that you have peace with whatever you decide.


good advice and have booked a counselling appointment - thanks.


all the best of luck and positive thoughts for the difficult decisions you have ahead of you x