Changing Donors - advice/experience needed


#1

We’ve done 2 IUIs now with donor sperm. The first round, the sperm count was on the low side- second time it was abysmally low. We have 4 more vials on hand at our REs office, and 2 more in storage with the bank (we really liked this donor). Despite this, we’ve made the decision to switch donors, on our doctor’s advice.

We’d like to choose our new donor from the same bank, The Sperm Bank of CA, as they’ve provided great customer service and we like their family size limit. However, the two donors we’ve narrowed things down to don’t really stand out to us.

So what we’re trying to decide is how important it is to feel a ‘connection’ to the donor. With our first donor, we both liked how he represented himself, how open and honest he seemed, etc. We’re note getting as good a “vibe” about his two potential replacements. We realize that we may never meet the donor, and that if we do it would be at our child’s behest 19 or more years from now! But we do intend on having all of the info we have about the donor available to the child, so we’d like him to at least reflect some of the values and interests that we have.

For those of you that have changed donors, did your standards for the donor (in terms of personality, appearance, etc) change when you started looking for someone else? Was it difficult for you to move on from your first donor?


#2

In Asian countries, it’s not easy to do egg donor legally here…


#3

DL- I would ask the sperm bank you are using if they have a minimum count/quality they require of their donors.
I have no knowledge of the bank you are using.

I will say I used Xytex and has superb quality sperm. I produced top quality blasts! I loved their customer service and my RE thinks highly of the specimens that he gets from them.

The other gals gave you great advice. Good luck to you in making your baby dreams come true!


#4

DL2006,
My hubby and I used California Cryo and they have tendencies to send out substandard vials. When we did the IVF cycle our RE office suggested we use Zygen because their specimans are great quality! It sure worked for us! Ask the sperm bank what their guaranteed speciman sperm countper vial should be. Have your RE office give you the count after they are done with the thaw. I now first hand that some of the sperm banks will not take the vials off the shelf and they just keep selling them with the intentions of hoping they never get questioned again. See that way they still make the money because no one will know unless a consumer questions them. Zygen was definitely the way to go for us! They pride themselves on quality and quantity!

Good luck and tons of baby dust to you!


#5

Like Godiva, we used Xytex and had great results! Our RE strongly recommends them and says their counts are always better than promised.

We used a sperm donor and an egg donor. When it came down to it, we made our final picks on our gut feelings. My first egg donor pick was perfect on paper, but decided not to donate. My second pick was actually the donor I was drawn to at first “sight,” and when we went with her, everything just fell perfectly in place.

We picked our sperm donor based on trying to be similar to DH in terms of physical traits. He wasn’t as academically gifted as I wanted, but he was sincere and shared our values as a family. That sealed the deal with us and I feel confident in my heart that we would like him as a person if we ever met him.

Best wishes! The donor decision and picking is so tough, but going with your gut will give you the best peace of mind in the long run!