I’m so glad you all found this thread.
Let me address the “worried about age gap” thing. I know one of the hardest things about this process for me is “not being in control” and I find that the IUI/science aspect allows me to feel “at least I am doing everything possible and a feeling of SOME kind of control.”
I thought once my body “knew” how to become pregnant that after DS was born, I would wait 6 months (since I had a c-section and OB told me to wait 6 months - ususally ayear, but he said since it took so long for Ds I could get a jump on things) and then would get pregnant right away. Well, it didnt happen that way… I tried 3 cycles on my own and went back for IUI. (waiting on my preg test, schedule for 8 DAYS FROM NOW!)
My SIL actually had PCO and irregular periods and it took 4 years with IUI to get her DD (now 8) and 3 more years for DS(now 5). While I was preg with my Ds she told me my brother wanted another one, but she didnt want to go through all that again. She said it wasnt worth it (gasp! I know!) and that if G-d wanted her to have another one, He’d have to get involved, so she gave up.
Well, she’s now pregnant. I cried when she told me because it TRULEY was a miracle. NO help, no nothing. She felt sick and said to herself. “I cant be pregnant, right?” When she told her 8 and 5 year old, they were THRILLED. The 8 year old cannot wait for the baby to come and she is already ready to be so helpful. I know when the baby turns 12 its sister will be 20, but as long as they have each other I think the age gap isnt the WORST thing.