Hi, I’m a newbie here.
I’m an IM through surrogacy plus donor eggs. It was a tough decision for me because genetically the baby will have no connection to me, but in the meantime it gave me HOPE - that’s smth I’ve almost lost. We’ve been trying for years but due to my severe endometriosis condition all efforts were fruitless. We even tried adoption but went through a failed match and it was heartbreaking and devastating.
Finally seeing light in the end of the tonnel, we agreed to tried surrogace. Our surrogate got pregnant from the very first attempt of fertiltization which is still hard to believe in. Today we will meet her for the first time of our lives. Very excited! Please tell me to relax a bit. I need it badly today
Hi, I’m a newbie here.
I know what you’re talking about. All those feelings are familiar to me. We’re also doing surrogacy, own eggs. 9 weeks pregnant now. Please keep updated, ok?
if there’s smth I can help you with, I’d willingly do
Hello, Amelia! Congrats on your SM’s pregnancy! How do you feel? Do you keep in touch with your SM? How is she? Don’t worry about using donor eggs. Of couse, it’s not a piece of cake, I mean being ready for this, but if you want your dreams come true, you need to sacrifice. I’ve found out that about a half of infertile couples whose ivf attempts with own eggs failed decide to give up trying…I didn’t know it’s so tough for many people to take it. I think that we must try till it’s possible to reach a success. But it’s my opinion…
Anyway, wish you all the best ! x
We can only wait for these events in the near future. We are only at the beginning of our journey. But we have already signed the contract and got acquainted with the donor data. We are with DE too.
We have a good semen sample was frozen. We are expecting for the news. Very nervously!
I wish your dreams come true, dear!
Hi and welcome, Am_elia! You excitement is natural, there’s nothing to worry about. So how is your surro mom? How was the meeting? What is your term of pregnancy now?
I hope everything is fine to the whole bunch of you: your DH and you, your surrogate mother and your little pea, of course!
It’s a community of like minded people, so be free to share your emotions and feelings.
Waiting for your update
Oh hi, honey!! Great news! We are in the same boat…that’s amazing, don’t you think? I’m now waiting for my SM to be matched! I’m so pleased with this. I couldn’t imagine this would be much easier to go trough surrogacy for the second time. As I know there is no need to worry because everything went good the previous time. I hope I could post the same update soon. Wish you luck !x
so many replies! Thank you ladies! thank you friends! That’s heartwarming to know that so many people care.
Please forgive me for not a prompt response: days were flying so fast after we returned from Kiev. Despite severe cold winter weather, we had great mood and were excited to meet our surrogate for the first time. We missed our 12 weeks scan, so we only could meet her on 16th week. The bump is already showing out. we’ve got twins there. the gender still a secret. Surrogate is a lady from Ukrainian countryside, not tall, much shorter than me, but still looks quite healthy. we all couldnt help crying at ultrasound, seeing babies on the screen. Baby A was evidently sleeping, but baby B seemed to be waving hand to us. Or at least I wish he did! I wonder how don’t they wake each other up by kicking? And yes, our surro mom said that she already can feel their kicks. That’s awesome. Our babies are growing!
Agnete, so you’re also doing surrogacy? where are you from? do you go locally or internationally for surrogacy? I hope all is well with your baby and surro as well. I’d be great to keep in touch. we’re just a few weeks ahead of you;)
Mannamay, I won’t call it ‘sacrifice’ actually. Yes, it’s challenging for a woman, for a man, for couple in general. But when you have no other way out, you just learn to take it for granted and adapt to situation. The mother is the one who raises a baby up and teaches everything needed for life. I won’t say that genetics make no sense. Absolutely, it does. But still upbringing, love, care, support and education is on top of all that, isn’t it?Do you already have a child?
Mydreammore, that’s ok to be nervous at the beginning of your journey. However, we still have to keep emotions under control… at least try to. I believe that energy is materialized and your vibes matter so much in your program’s outcome. You say you got acquainted with donor data. Do you choose the donor?
It was a metaphor or so…You see, not every woman, man or couple is ready to take this challenge. it’s hard to adapt to situation if you can’t accept the idea itself. Well, i haven’t faced the problem yet, but I’ve watched movies about parenting. It’s a pity, very often children are cruel and they focus on a biological aspect. they forget who raised them, forget about things which really matter…I hope none of us would face such an attitude. Anyway, right way of thinking, dear! Yes, I’m a mother. It’s weird, yeah? I’m not ttc and don’t want to have one more kid, but still i’m here. I just hope I could be of help like those women who were suporting me through thick and thin…
oh, Ame_lia! Your feelings are so familiar to me! We also had (and have) twins, fraternal brothers. I also used to think how they don’t wake each other up when they were in belly. When they are born, they used to be very sleepy - both. It was premature birth so they needed to be at NICU for 6 days. they were very sleepy almost till 1 months old. Now they have good night sleep, both. they very seldom wake each other up. however, at day time it’s sometimes tough to make them sleep
Am_elia, many thanks for sharing your emotions after your 16 weeks scan and meeting surrogate. I know how you were feeling: we met our surrogate just on Friday last week, the only difference that it was our 12 weeks scan. We saw our baby! Everything is absolutely fine, all organs and collar zone. The surrogate also seemed excited with the meeting. The surprising thing was that she is three years older than me. In any case, she looks strong and healthy enough. She said everything was absolutely fine but for morning sickness at early stages.
She liked the presents we brought to her, also some souvenirs from Norway. She has never been to Norway. Moreover, she has never been abroad - ever!
so, you’re a mother. Great! Congrats! Through surrogacy as well, right? also donor eggs? So, you seem to be more experienced in this field, and this is you who I should ask for advice. May I ask why you don’t want more children? Or you always wanted to have a singleton? How old is your child now?
Great, how do you cope with your little guys now? and back when they were newborns? I know that twins is double happiness, and we really dreamt of twins, but it 's also doubled responsibility, and all your efforts, love and care - also doubled. Isn’t it? Tomorrow is our 20 weeks ultrasound. We are very excited. I hope this time they will reveal their gender!
[QUOTE=“Agnete, post: 1869866, member: 87055”]Am_elia, many thanks for sharing your emotions after your 16 weeks scan and meeting surrogate. I know how you were feeling: we met our surrogate just on Friday last week, the only difference that it was our 12 weeks scan. We saw our baby! Everything is absolutely fine, all organs and collar zone. The surrogate also seemed excited with the meeting. The surprising thing was that she is three years older than me. In any case, she looks strong and healthy enough. She said everything was absolutely fine but for morning sickness at early stages.
She liked the presents we brought to her, also some souvenirs from Norway. She has never been to Norway. Moreover, she has never been abroad - ever![/QUOTE]
So, you also met your surrogate. I’m sure you were overwhelmed with emotions, weren’t you? Unfortunately, we couldn’t travel to our 12 weeks scan. I wish we did, though. It’s the pivotal moment of pregnancy. Will you travel to the following scans?
I think that the age of your SM is not the most essential thing here. IMO. Anyways, they check their health and ability to give birth to a child and carry pregnancy. Only absolutely healthy women are approved. Our surrogate is much younger than me. She is 30 y o.
I am, thank you! no, actually it was a donor egg ivf. Don’t be surprised, I just love to know all about everything…maybe it’s not that weird keeping in mind that I’m already a mother and still I’m here writing to you. I’d love to have more babies of course, but I don’t want to be selfish regarding my age. I don’t want my baby to be alone, I don’t want to prepare children for life without parents. I’m 53 yo and I’m not going to live forever…My Lily is almost three and a half.
We’ve go a report on our surrogate pregnancy yesterday. I was waiting for this letter with a sinking heart. The 16 weeks scan didn’t reveal the gender of our babies, so we hoped so much that this time they will behave and show who they are. So… I can now proceed with baby shopping in blue colors, for both. we’re future parents of two baby boys!
The scan was also fine. They are healthy and growing well
Mannamay, thanks for your reply. sorry if I sounded too nosy. Sure, it’s your life and you know better. Some of us want a bunch of children, some prefer to stay childless ever. You sound very happy and satisfied with your life and mothering now. Oh, 3 and half is a gorgeous age! Many questions, yeah? This is the time of “I want to know everything, mom”
I know because I’ve had a lot of children in my life, not mine genetically, but still they were in my life, and still are. Some of them are about to have their own children now. But this is another story
Am_elia, gorgeous news! So two boys! Lucky you! Yes, you’re right - you will now have three men to care for BUT respectively there will be three men to care about YOU, isn’t it?
As a mom of a boy I can tell this for sure - boys, even little ones - are already MEN.
So, congratulations! Now you know it and can proceed with baby shopping. Will you decorate a nursery in a special manner, just for boys?