Failed IVF - Dr. says go to Egg Donor


#1

this is my first post, sorry if this is in the wrong place.

We started this Fertility roller coaster 1.5 yrs ago. Typical route to where we are - tried on our own, 3 cycles of clomid, moved to Fertility Doc skipped IUI (why spend the money when we know 4 couples who have tried and failed) went straight to the big guns of IVF, Round 1 CX low level at 46.1 (IDK what that was), Round 2 proceeded on with low level through (max dose of menopure and gonal f with micro dose lupron), retrieved 9 eggs ICSI, 7 embryo’s on day 2, DND until day 5 phone call you have 7 (excellent), Day 6 phone call 7 dead. You have options but IVF isn’t one of them.
Options:

  1. Adopt
  2. get lucky on our own
  3. egg donor
  4. IUI

Anyone else had this happen??

Anyone else ANGRY!!???

Anyone else tired of hearing to “relax” or “pray about it”

Thanks!!


#2

[QUOTE=Onesassygirl_6]this is my first post, sorry if this is in the wrong place.

We started this Fertility roller coaster 1.5 yrs ago. Typical route to where we are - tried on our own, 3 cycles of clomid, moved to Fertility Doc skipped IUI (why spend the money when we know 4 couples who have tried and failed) went straight to the big guns of IVF, Round 1 CX low level at 46.1 (IDK what that was), Round 2 proceeded on with low level through (max dose of menopure and gonal f with micro dose lupron), retrieved 9 eggs ICSI, 7 embryo’s on day 2, DND until day 5 phone call you have 7 (excellent), Day 6 phone call 7 dead. You have options but IVF isn’t one of them.
Options:

  1. Adopt
  2. get lucky on our own
  3. egg donor
  4. IUI

Anyone else had this happen??

Anyone else ANGRY!!???

Anyone else tired of hearing to “relax” or “pray about it”

Thanks!![/QUOTE]

So sorry that your cycle ended this way. If you don’t mind my asking, how old are you? The reason I ask is that 1 “failed” cycle usually doesn’t mean going immediately to DE! I would definitely get a second opinion!


#3

sorry

I had my egg retrieval on my 35th birthday.

Hubby is 31 w normal lab results on everything.

I also forgot to mention as many of you know the cost - I added up everything we are up to 24K.


#4

[QUOTE=Onesassygirl_6]I had my egg retrieval on my 35th birthday.

Hubby is 31 w normal lab results on everything.

I also forgot to mention as many of you know the cost - I added up everything we are up to 24K.[/QUOTE]

I got my signature figured out so here’s more info.


#5

Hello,

I would definetly suggest a second opinion. We are moving on to DE eggs after our second failed IVF. But we did go get a second opinion with a RE with more experience with my medical issue of low ovarian reserve. She advised me we could try a different protocol, but even with that we were still only looking at about a 20% chance of success per cycle. Because of the cost and time we decided those odds werent high enough for us so after alot of soul searching we chose to go the donor egg route. I wish you lots of success whatever you decide. Feel free to email me if you have any more questions.


#6

I dont understand why your doctor wait til day 6 to do a transfer? If your embryos are able to grow to blasts (7of them!!!) you have pretty good quality embryos. Before moving to donor eggs i suggest you do PGD on the day 5 blasts. If they are normal and the blasts die again on day 6 it is the culture that they use and possibly their lab technique but of course you dont want them to arrest again!!! So i suggest seeing a different doctor and ask them to culture to day 5 and do PGD. Good luck.


#7

Very frustrating - I know - I’m at 28K with 2 IVF. I’ve always done my ET at 2 days but that’s because I started off with so little, it was better to get them in instead of staying in a dish.
I , like you, skipped the whole IUI process (long story) but am now seriously considering going ‘backwards’. However, I’m waiting to hear what my doctors advises.

Personally, it sounds like you are still a contender for IVF, not sure why your RE has suggested this - unless he/she can for sure say there is a chromosomal issue. PGD is certainly an option but an added cost.

And if anyone is saying relax and pray about it, I’m sure has good intentions but you need to let them know, there is more to it than that. Again, solely my opinion.

If I hear ‘things happen for a reason’ one more time, I might scream!!!


#8

[QUOTE=alexi]I dont understand why your doctor wait til day 6 to do a transfer? If your embryos are able to grow to blasts (7of them!!!) you have pretty good quality embryos. Before moving to donor eggs i suggest you do PGD on the day 5 blasts. If they are normal and the blasts die again on day 6 it is the culture that they use and possibly their lab technique but of course you dont want them to arrest again!!! So i suggest seeing a different doctor and ask them to culture to day 5 and do PGD. Good luck.[/QUOTE]

She wasn’t waiting for day 6 to transfer - we were going to do genetic testing/PGD on day 5. The freeze until PGS results came back. The lab is super swamped I was told it would be 6 weeks until implant. Maybe I didn’t make that clear :frowning: Anyway she says the embryo’s arrested between days 3-5. This center doesn’t disturb the embryo’s between days 2-5. She felt that the evidence from cx on round 1 to barely making it to round 2 that egg quality was low and Donor egg was the best route for a baby if I wanted to have the pregnancy experience. As far as second opinion she is the best around (most expensive too). It is difficult to change dr’s at this point. We have spent 24K and are running out of $$.

Does this help clarify?
Thanks


#9

Options:

  1. Adopt
  2. get lucky on our own
  3. egg donor
  4. IUI

I am sorry and I know how frustrating it is. I just want to make sure you honestly do consider all your options. You also have the option of Embryo Adoption, which will give you the opportunity to experience pregnancy and childbirth, and is far less expensive than donor egg.

While embryo donation through a clinic usually means long waiting lists, Embryo Adoption agencies currently have more embryos than waiting adopting families and the process can go very quickly. Embryo Adoption is the lowest cost adoption available, and because you adopt all the embryos a family has remaining you often get multiple FET attempts or multiple children from one adoption.

I recomend the Snowflakes Embryo Adoption Program.


#10

[QUOTE=bella89014]Hello,

I would definetly suggest a second opinion. We are moving on to DE eggs after our second failed IVF. But we did go get a second opinion with a RE with more experience with my medical issue of low ovarian reserve. She advised me we could try a different protocol, but even with that we were still only looking at about a 20% chance of success per cycle. Because of the cost and time we decided those odds werent high enough for us so after alot of soul searching we chose to go the donor egg route. I wish you lots of success whatever you decide. Feel free to email me if you have any more questions.[/QUOTE]

Thanks for the advice! After much conversation we are headed egg donation route.

To address someone else’s question about the DE being the best, it is per her reputation but also was on the Top List of Fertility Docs in the nation in 2012. I know of 5 couples whom have used her with success.

Thank you all for being open and supportive. I was feeling so alone and unsure of my choices.