Fertility Jealousy


I am dealing with secondary infertility and cannot help but feel jealous of those around me that have gotten pregnant with no issues. I’ve gone through 3 cycles of IVF which resulted in 2 chemical pregnancies. My SIL has “Irish Triplets” and my niece is currently pregnant. What makes me even more upset is that my SIL is constantly asking me when I am going to have another one. My niece of course is 20, has no job, dropped out of college, her boyfriend who is also 20 and has no job and they both live at home with my SIL. Why is it fair that they are no where financially and emotionally ready for a baby but they get to have one? I get so mad and jealous when i see mothers in public with 3 or 4 young kids and of course they are pregnant with #4 or 5, and they are obviously financially stressed (paying for groceries with food stamps, clothes looking worn and tattered). I am extremely grateful and thankful for the beautiful, smart little one that I have and nothing will change that. Please help me deal with these emotions.


I know how you feel. It’s tough! I am also trying for #2 - but I had primary infertility, too. Took us 12 years to get her. And I’ve recently had my very last shot at IVF - the crazy thing was it worked! We were over the moon! But sadly, our little girl didn’t make it. So now I’m at the end of my road, still hoping against hope for that out of the blue miracle. I find myself even jealous of the girls from my original due date thread who have had successes since our babies were born. Just as an aside, 3 of them have now had surprise natural pregnancies!

So, I don’t know how to help. But I certainly can support.


[B]essemkay thank you so much for understanding! I feel like such an awful person for having such hateful thoughts and being so judgmental towards other people.[/B]