Friendship and infertility


#1

so my dh and i have been on this journey for a while now, we took a break for a couple of months and are now ready to get started on this again. i am just now towards the end of my fifth chemical pregnancy, and we are ready for second opinion, and the two top places close by me are my previous dr, and shady grove.
i have a friend, not too close, who works at shady grove, and we are kind of private about the matter, and dh does not want to even try and go to SG because of the risk of running into our friend there, we have tried to keep this matter really private.
should i just suck it up and go, how do i tell dh that we can cross that bridge when we get to it. i know there are privacy laws on these things, but again, my fear is she might mention this off hand if we see each other, which is bound to happen, in front of other people, or again i guess i can tell her to please keep this private, idk, so confused. i want a child badly enough that my thinking is, if we do become successful, none of this would have mattered.
how would you approach it?


#2

Im sorry about your chemicals. I would go to the best clinic possible for your second opinion. HIPAA provides federal regulations for patient info privacy. Your friend CANNOT talk to you about your treatment in front of other people or even mention to others that you are getting treatment. Shes not supposed to look at your records if shes not involved in your treatment. You can file a complaint w/ federal agency if she violates your privacy. I would hope that a place like Shady Grove would train their employees accordingly. But if you’re still concerned, you can bring it up with your doctor at the consult or even with the receptionist when you make the appt that you know X and that you want reassurance of your privacy.

Good luck!

[QUOTE=decsagi]so my dh and i have been on this journey for a while now, we took a break for a couple of months and are now ready to get started on this again. i am just now towards the end of my fifth chemical pregnancy, and we are ready for second opinion, and the two top places close by me are my previous dr, and shady grove.
i have a friend, not too close, who works at shady grove, and we are kind of private about the matter, and dh does not want to even try and go to SG because of the risk of running into our friend there, we have tried to keep this matter really private.
should i just suck it up and go, how do i tell dh that we can cross that bridge when we get to it. i know there are privacy laws on these things, but again, my fear is she might mention this off hand if we see each other, which is bound to happen, in front of other people, or again i guess i can tell her to please keep this private, idk, so confused. i want a child badly enough that my thinking is, if we do become successful, none of this would have mattered.
how would you approach it?[/QUOTE]


#3

Thanks YellowAster, i agree with that, and i guess i should give her the benefit of the doubt, i feel horrible after typing all that out and making an assumption that it might slip up, but like you said, it’s a well known clinic and i would hope that they have high training standards on these things :slight_smile:
thanks again!


#4

It’s not an unreasonable concern. After all, HIPAA does protect you but people are human, and we’ve all been to the doctor’s office where they ask you detailed information at the check-in desk as though none of the people standing two feet away could possibly overhear. However, I think the best thing to do is simply, when you go to that clinic, tell your friend how important it is to you to maintain your privacy and ask her not to bring it up when you see each other elsewhere. It’s totally reasonable, even just as a friend, to ask her to respect your wishes that you don’t want to talk about it. Like YellowAster said, you should go to the best doctor you can, so don’t let this worry get in your way.


#5

[QUOTE=kashiruvana]It’s not an unreasonable concern. After all, HIPAA does protect you but people are human, and we’ve all been to the doctor’s office where they ask you detailed information at the check-in desk as though none of the people standing two feet away could possibly overhear. However, I think the best thing to do is simply, when you go to that clinic, tell your friend how important it is to you to maintain your privacy and ask her not to bring it up when you see each other elsewhere. It’s totally reasonable, even just as a friend, to ask her to respect your wishes that you don’t want to talk about it. Like YellowAster said, you should go to the best doctor you can, so don’t let this worry get in your way.[/QUOTE]

Thanks kashiruvana, dh and i talked about it and he is coming back around and agreeing that we should go to the clinic, and say something to her if we do come across her :slight_smile: