good friend "accidentally" pregnant


#1

good friend of mine and her bf got “accidentally” pregnant so they just pushed up the engagement and wedding. she will be married 7 months when her baby is born. how come some people just [I]look[/I] at their partner and get pregnant and some try everything and it just doesn’t work???
i want to be a good friend and be supportive for her, but i am finding it sooo difficult!
any ideas? this is really harder than i expected!!


#2

[QUOTE=tehilas]i want to be a good friend and be supportive for her, but i am finding it sooo difficult!
any ideas? this is really harder than i expected!![/QUOTE]

It is hard when you are TTC and people (family or friends) are able to without a thought. It is hard to deal with others pregnancies. When my BF got pregnant, I just wanted to curl up and die. I felt the large green giant every day of her pregnancy. But I stuck through it, because in the grand scheme of things, I didn’t want to loose the many years of friendship we had together.
I tried to calm myself before seeing her by doing 5 min of deep breath breathing. I then talked to her about how I didn’t want to only talk about the pregnancy, even though it was now a large part of her life. I also emphasized that I was not the friend to complain to about her pregnancy. With these little ‘rules’ I think it helped. However I was still extremely jealous the whole time.

Good luck to you.


#3

Thats a good idea. If i am honest about how much I can handle hearing maybe we can still have a relationship, but it will be difficult
I feel so lonely in this. Just got a visit from :af: today too, which just makes everything seem worse, even though I already knew this was a “wasted cycle”!


#4

No cycle is “wasted” because you never know. I hate the monthly reminder. I hope that you are able to stay friends. It is hard and a lot of work, but if you are honest, then I think that it will work out. The first 2 years are the hardest.

Good luck and try to stay positive.