Having a baby after hystectomy


#1

I’ve never thought that I will ever start such a thread, but sometimes life decides for us. I’m a happy mother of a three year old boy. Unfortunately, it was a very difficult delivery. Obviously, because of doctor’s mistake I had uterus rapture. And, consequently, hysterectomy.

Still, my dh wants to have a daughter. It was a tough thing for us to discuss. My life dream was to have at least three children, but I know that I will never have a chance to give birth to another child. We’ve heard about the possibility of carrying our baby by another woman. I mean a surrogate mother. This idea makes me feel a bit awkward, but… do I have any other choice?


#2

Dear, your story is heartbreaking. Anyways, you have a child and this is a delight for you. I hope things will work out for you and you will have a sister for you son and so awaited daughter for you and dh.

Hopefully, modern reproductive medicine provides opportunity to many people like you to become parents. I know what I say. My story was also heartbreaking, but I met specialist whose motto is “There’s no absolute infertility”. Now I am a mother of gorgeous twins that were born with the help of assisted reproductive technologies. I’m not ashamed of it, as well as I’m not going to hide the truth from my children when they grow up.

I understand your hesitations. You have already been pregnant and gave birth to a child so you know about this invisible bond between mother and child even in the uterus. I’m sure that even if your child will be borne by a surrogate, your bonds will be still very strong. Mainly because this is YOUR child.


#3

There’s no absolute infertility – oh, it sounds quite optimistic, however I’m sure that there’re a lot of people who may disagree with it. The same about me: I have my ovaries functioning ok, but I don’t have a uterus, so I will NEVER be able to give birth to a child again.


#4

You know, your words prove the same thing: there’s no absolute infertility! Yes, you don’t have uterus, but you have eggs. I think you’re able to have biologically yours child, from your egg, but carried and born by other lady. I think this this is a great chance. In a few years with your so awaited daughter, you will forget the details of her birth. I know that so many couples pursuing surrogacy have to use donor egg for insemination, so take it positively! This is your advantage!


#5

Hi
long weeks of discussions with my dh and yes - we finally decided!
Next week we’re flying to Kyiv, Ukraine to check up possible variants for our surrogacy program. we take it all very seriously and with deep consideration, so we are going to visit at least three clinics and know about their options. By now, we’re opting Nadiya, BioTexCom and Isida clinics.

we’re ready for your suggestions in case anyone has dealt with these clinics directly or had heard some true reviews. we don’t want to waste our time. or perhaps any other suggestions. I think we will have enough time to visit one or two more clinics.

thank you for any ideas

xxx


#6

Agnete, how was your journey? any news?


#7

Hi,
thanx for caring.
Yes, we have news. Our trip to Kyiv was rather exhausting because there was so much on our agenda. We had no time even to have lunch. Hopefully, our ds left home with his grandparents. I saw a couple in the clinic travelling with their child probably around 2 years old. It was very tough for him. Of course, we were missing him, but the reasons for this trip was very serious and we didn’t even knew where it’ll bring us. Ok, three clincs, three consultations, different conditions of contracts, but very welcoming people and comfortable conditions for IPs as well. My dh was in charge of taking decision. He asked a lot of questions.
Finally, contract was signed and fist payment made. Our doctor gave us green for OE surrogacy. Now we’re in wait for a proper surrogate.
I’ll let you know when they contact us.


#8

Agnete, you’ve done so quickly! good job. my congrats for OE approval. have they already provided u with all medicines and injections needed? got the protocol? i can only imagine how overwhelmed you are. i hope for a quick match for u. for us, it DE so very little depended on me. in ur case, u’r absolutely in control of the situation. be very attentive with each step of ur protocol and follow dr’s recommendations very thoroughly. if any questions, call the one who guides yr program.
btw, what is the approximate wait period for a surro? what do they say?


#9

Thank you. really, I have a lot of questions and feel absolutely illiterate with all those things I’ll have to go through. oh, yeah, they gave me all medicines and explained how to do those belly skin injections. In any case, I’m still a bit frightened. But I know I’ll do all that. Yes, they told me to follow the protocol very strictly. The only thing I’m really worried about is weight gain. I’m slightly overweight so it might be a problem for me.

As for the wait period, they told from 1 to 3 months as a rule. It depends. For us, it might be even longer because our clinic will be out of service for 2 weeks in August. It may get it longer for us.

How are your boys, Kim? :slight_smile:


#10

yeah, dear, you have to follow your protocol very strictly. it’ll help them to get more eggs and of better quality. have they prescribed you vitamins? it’s also very important.
well, don’t worry about those two weeks when the clinic will be closed. do these two weeks change anything dramatically for you? i think not. lets hope you’ll be matched with your surro asap.
oh, my boys are absolutely fine, thank for asking. making their first steps. i can’t wait they start walking by themselves coz they always want to hold me by the hand. all day long. it sometimes seems to me that i run more than an avarage football player per day. lol
it’s their first birthday just in a week so we’re busy getting everything ready for the party


#11

Kim, congrats on your kids’ birthday! I hope you had gorgeous celebration. They will never remember this day but for you it’s the most exciting time ever, I’m sure.
as for me, not many news for now. They still haven’t matched us with a surro:( and I don’t know how much it may take. moreover, the clinic is closing for sanitary procedure. i’m starting to loose my patience. I’m always worrying about everything but now i’m twice… no, ten times more overwhelmed that usually.
you see, there were so many people in the clinic with us. Many of them were same stage as we - waiting for a surro. I’m so afraid we would be put to the bottom of the list as we already have a child.
does this matter or I’m just seeing things?:eek:


#12

I understand your concerns, hun. We also had to wait. That’s a normal procedure. All IPs wait. Some wait longer, some are matched quicker. Much depends on the clinic, though. I think you’re panicking. It won’t help so please don’t. You need to survive this waiting time happily otherwise it’d overwhelm you. Devote more time to your hubbie and son. Try cooking or go to a gym… or whatever you like.

If you want, I may tell you jokes if it draws your attention far from negative thoughts. Lol

I think you’d better be with your family now. Family is our relief from all stresses

Btw, what about yoga or meditation?


#13

I know, Kim. we spend a lot of time together with family. my ds always keeps me busy but still I’m too emotional about waiting and delays.
our manager Anastasia is also on vocation till the end of August, so there’ll be no news soon.
it’s all about waiting
hope you’r doing well and thank you for being supportive
xx


#14

hey, just wanted to update that they approved a surro for us and I’m starting my hormonal stimulation this month :slight_smile: (if everything’s ok with ultrasound I hope it will)
trying to get things sorted out with all those medications. i have a lot. and a but afraid of side effects and hyperstimuation :eek: hope is all we have, after all.
btw, I’ve started my own blog sharing my surrogacy story so if interested please join here
http://havingababyafterhysterectomy.blogspot.no/
xxx


#15

I’m not sure if there’s anyone following my updates here on this forum, but still I have great news to share: it’s day 4 of my super ovulation stimulation and we’re setting off to Kiev today. They are waiting me tomorrow in the clinic for an ultrasound scan and then I continue stimulation under my doctor’s supervision. super excited (not to say nervous and scared) but with positive vibes in my heart xxx


#16

the travel to Kiev was fine and exciting. I was really afraid of surgery - eggs retrieval procedure. staff was attentive and polite. the doctors were charged positively. maybe that helped. they got 8 eggs and then 4 AA quality blastos. we asked to transfer 2, and 2 more were frozen. They said that we wont receive any HCG updates before December 19. This will be tough TWW. Waiting is what I hate most of all. In any case, fingers crossed. I hope that lady from the Ukraine takes very good care of my embies and of herself of course


#17

awesome congrats! 8 eggs is a good result, isn’t it? btw , how do you feel? today i read about egg retrieval procedure, aspiration if i’m not mistaken, and it’s not that one you want to have again and again. I don’t know hhow egg donors stand it, all that pains…urgh


#18

I’m not sure 8 is good enough. I’ve heard other ladies get around 20 and even more. In anycase, not all of them are appropriate for fertilization. We got only 4 embies out of 8 eggs. So it’s just a half.

Also, it was not exactly aspiration. It was quite a complicate surgery with total anesthesia. They gave me pain killers but when they stopped working, the pain was evident. It also slightly bleed. Add all tortunres of hormonal injections. OHh, it definitely wasn’t an easy journey. I hope it was worth it. we’re going to know the result next week


#19

Agnete, do you know the result already? It seems they should have already told you if it’s positive
looking forward for your news x


#20

Hey Kim! thanks for your interests
I posted yesterday but in another thread.
It seems it positive – beta 320!
Ultrasound will set everything clear, expected on 28/12
Thank you for your support and advice xxx