Heart Broken


#1

So after 5 IVF cycles I finaly recieved my first :bfp: ever… then last week I started to bleed and went to my RE for an early u/s (about 4 1/2 weeks) we saw the sac, yolk, fetal pole and early signs of the heartbeat. Was told to come in in 1 week (today) for another u/s but everything was right on track. The day after I had stopped bleeding so my nervousness went away. Little did I know I had alot to be worried about. I went in for my 2nd u/s today and NOTHING!!! No sac at all, RE said I must have miscarried. He asked me if the bleeding had gotten worse after he saw me or if I had passed any clots or had any pains and I didnt. The bleeding had actually stopped the day after I saw him, I just don’t understand what happened. Shouldn’t I have experienced SOMETHING if I was miscarrying??? Or could it have been that I was miscarrying on that Monday that I saw him but when he checked the u/s I hadn’t lost the sac yet? Can you tell on an u/s if you are in the process of miscarrying? I am just at a loss right now an do not know what to do with myself. I was so excited to, after 4 failed cycles, finally get that :bfp: . Do I even continue with a 6th cycle now, I have 4 more frozen embryos but how many failures do I do before I call it quits???


#2

I am so, so sorry. I don’t have any answers for you, but just wanted to send :grouphug: .


#3

i am so sorry you are going through this. If you have four more frozen embryos, I would definitely suggest at least using them. FET is a lot less painful on your body. I wish you all the best! :grouphug:


#4

[FONT=Comic Sans MS]First, :grouphug: . I can’t even begin to find words to offer you. While you are the only one that can decide if you want to proceed with another cycle (FET), if it were me and I still had 4 frosties, I would do it again.[/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Take some time to grieve, process what has happened, talk with your RE and come up with a plan together.[/FONT]


#5

Thank you guys for your kind words. Just a question though… Here is a breakdown of last weeks bleeding situation, I woke up with some cramping (less than my period, similiar to PIO cramping), when I went to the bathroom I noticed some light pink blood when I wiped. Called RE in a panic, had to wait 3 hrs. to be seen so I through on a panty liner. When I got to RE’s office I went to the bathroom and the blood had almost filled the pantyliner (not a pad and 3 1/2 hrs. after putting it on) the cramping had turned into period type cramps but nothing severe. Had the ultrasound done, everything looked great. By the time I left the office the cramping had stopped completely. Later that night the pinkish red blood turned to a brown color. Woke the next morning and a little pink staining when I wiped (no cramps or pain), put on a pad and by that night (over 12 hrs later) only had very small drops of light brown on pad. Wed. was the same thing and by thur. had no more brown staining or anything. I never had a clot pass, and I only had moderate cramps that first day. My question is… when in all this did I miscarry??? Could I hav started to miscarry the day I had the u/s and it didnt pick anything up? Would everything have looked normal if I was in the middle of miscarrying? I only wonder b/c everything I can find on a miscarriage says bleeding will become heavy (soaking through mulitple pads frequently) with clots with or without serve cramping and or lower back pain and I experienced none of this. I just cant believe it was there one minute and a week later GONE without any common symptoms, and none of my pregnancy symptoms had decreased either.


#6

I guess is possible that the embryo was reabsorbed into the lining and you haven’t shed it yet.:grouphug:


#7

I am really sorry to hear you are going through this. I have had a missed miscarriage before and understand how painful all of this is.

Miscarriages can be quite different, it is my understanding that you may later bleed again or that could be all the bleeding there was. Because you were really early on, there are not always clots with a miscarriage before 6 weeks. However, if you feel unsure and are definitely still experiencing pregnancy symptoms in the next couple of days (sometimes it takes a day or 2 for hcg levels to come all the way down) then I would ask to see the RE again for another u/s just to confirm or go see your ob/gyn for confirmation.

Lots of :grouphug: for you.


#8

Sorry you have to go through this…

There is a girl on another thread (Loss at 19 weeks) that had the same issue and when they went in for the D&C they found the baby and heartbeat. The placenta was hiding the baby. Maybe that happened to you?

I also have a tilted uterus and they didn’t find my second baby till 9 weeks because it was hiding.

I would ask to go in for another ultrasound just in case the baby was missed.

Good luck and hope it all works out.


#9

First, I am so sorry you are going through this. I imagine you are an emotional wreck. I had a very early m/c about 7 yrs ago. I started bleeding about 9 days after a missed period (about 5 wks pg?). I had heavy bleeding and cramping and passed clots.

I agree with the PP who said it’s possible the sac with contents was merely reabsorbed. I had a twin pg with my first IVF, the twin that didn’t make it (stopped developing at yolk stage) never caused me to bleed or pass a clot. It just reabsorbed.

Another thought for you is to request a repeat u/s in a few days, if not with your RE, then an OB. Is there any way your RE could have missed seeing the sac? If you explain your situation, and lack of heavy bleeding/cramping I think you have a valid point in requesting a repeat. With my last m/c at almost 7wks, we saw only a small sac yet I chose to have a repeat u/s 5 days later “just to be sure”. When you have to do IVF to get pg, you just gotta make sure.

Again, so sorry…


#10

[quote=Erintobe]There is a girl on another thread (Loss at 19 weeks) that had the same issue and when they went in for the D&C they found the baby and heartbeat. The placenta was hiding the baby. Maybe that happened to you?

I also have a tilted uterus and they didn’t find my second baby till 9 weeks because it was hiding.
[/quote]

I’ve read stories over the years on these boards of incidences just like this. I would really encourage you to request a repeat u/s.


#11

I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine how painful it is to miscarry. I just wanted to say that if you think you can handle it emotionally try again. Don’t give up unless you just can’t handle it anymore. :grouphug:


#12

First of all…I am so very sorry :grouphug: It is so hard. The only thing that sounds VERY odd to me is that you saw the yolk sac and fetal pole at 4 1/2 weeks. I have never heard of anyone seeing a fetal pole so soon. I think it’s possible that your Dr did not in fact see a fetal pole then. I also think that i would get a second opinion and another ultrasound. I would also take a look at the following site: The Misdiagnosed Miscarriage Site. GL to you.


#13

Hi love, first I want to give you a hug :grouphug: Please know it’s NOTHING you did or didn’t do. When I miscarried I bled like a period and had cramps over three days and on the third day I had intense cramps, went it the bathroom and passed a golf ball sized clot, then the cramps went away. I def. felt it and saw it. Sorry to be so detailed, but I want you to know what it was really like.

Ask if you can go in again or meet with your RE. They should meet with you right away.

Again :grouphug: For you, I am so so so so sorry :frowning:


#14

I am so very sorry for your loss! It is incredibly painful and sad.

Is your RE going to follow your HCG level back to zero? That is why mine did with my miscarriage and the constant drop in numbers was there confimation I was miscarrying. Sure enough when the number reached zero, I began to bleed. Maybe this is happening with you as well and you will bleed once your HCG goes to zero?

Also please do the FET, it is a blessing to have eggs make it to freeze and you can become pregnant with a FET and have a normal pregnancy and healthy baby. Good luck :grouphug:


#15

I’m very sorry,I recently had a miscarriage I know how hard it is to go through this. My Re continued to do bloodtest to watch my number fall to zero, they need to do this for you too. If I were you I would want another ultrasound. Again I’m so sorry your going through this :grouphug:


#16

So sorry sweetie. Dont lose faith and don’t give up. Give yourself time to cope if you think thats the best thing. :grouphug:


#17

Thank you all, I just emailed my RE and asked if there was any way we could have missed the sac and if I should stay on my meds until results from the beta are in.

They did do a beta test but prolly won’t get the results until tomorrow. The only thing is my last beta done was at 460 (my 3rd beta) and I didn’t have another done b/c the levels were doubling perfectly and I had gone in for that 1st u/s where he saw what he needed to. That was well over a week ago so even if my HCG levels are dropping would they be below that yet or do you think I will have to go in for a 2nd beta to judge if they are dropping? Also, why I would love to remain positive when they first inserted the internal sono the 1st u/s the sac was right there in plain sight, no need to “search around”. this time we didnt see anything when he first inserted, then he searched around and blew the picture up, and even looked at my last one in comparison. Do you really think we could have missed it?? I just dont want to have a glimmer of hope to have it crushed again.


#18

No need for a repeat u/s… beta levels are at a 6, m/c confirmed :frowning: . RE spent the day going over my file and new bloodwork and has some new ideas, wants to see me Friday so we will give the rest of the frozen embabies a shot.


#19

Checking back in…So, so, sorry…
I’m so glad you had the Beta test done and confirmed. It is so hard, to be on that emotional high of being pg, then plummeting to that low. Wishing you the best of luck with your FET.

:babydust: :babydust:


#20

I’m soooo sorry to hear what you are having to go through. I totally know your pain. We went through 6 total cycles before having our little miracle. (four fresh cycles and 2 frozen donor cycles) Please don’t give up!!! We had three miscarriages along the way and were still able to carry my little guy to full term. It is so hard to convince yourself that you still have a shot, but you do! 6th time was it for us, hope it is for you too!!! If you would like to hear our entire story, you can visit my blog. Don’t give up on the rest of your frosties!!!