Lori38, I’m so sorry you have been through such a ringer. I agree, it is so hard to know what to do and sometimes I think the restrictions can cause more stress and I SWEAR that is a HUGE factor in any type of conception, natural or not. I remember a Maya abdominal massage therapist telling me that one of her friends said it was too bad that couples couldn’t take the money for IVF and spend a year on vacation somewhere with no stresses and just each other, but you know with jobs, life and pure mechanical issues in the womb, that isn’t always feasible.
I will tell you that I abstained from drinking my first IVF which resulted in a BFP the moment I went to the IVF education course and they recommended it, which was a couple weeks before my actual IVF meds began. I stayed off everything considered “bad”, including my beloved caffeine and chocolate for pretty much the entire pregnancy. On my subsequent FET, I wasn’t issued any restrictions by the IVF doctor (perhaps because I wasnt focused on producing eggs). I drank caffeine in moderate amounts, definitely drank wine and did not follow all the restrictions that I had before (after all, I had toddler to chase after so I was lifting and exerting myself all over the place). First thought I had ruined it by having a very low positive on first blood test, but 9 months later, I had a very beautiful and healthy baby girl. So, I’m not sure what advice to follow. I think staying off caffeine is critical for IVF, they know caffeine impacts fertility so if you are trying to produce lots of eggs, it makes sense to stay off it or at least keep it to the bare minimum or healthier green tea. I would probably stay off wine too if I was doing another IVF, but that wasn’t hard for me and didn’t stress me out. I honestly believe that you have to be in as relaxed state of mind as you possibly can when going through IVF. I have friends that really had difficulty with meds and I think that impacted outcome. I knew meds would mess with me so I just took a deep yoga breath and rolled with it so it wasn’t making me so stressed that I needed chocolate or a glass of wine.
But honestly, I don’t really know how to answer. My RE was very specific about IVF restrictions and others are not and my high risk maternal fetal specialist who helped us with the loss of twin during first pregnancy didn’t seem to think an occasional glass of wine makes a difference (and actually I had had none), and I don’t know if that impacts outcomes or not. I would almost say that if you avoided it first round, maybe you should just allow yourself a little the second round of IVF, to see if that is what you need to stay relaxed.
Not very helpful, am I? Hang in there and stay relaxed and as optimistic as possible (and this is coming from a very pessimistic person, just ask my husband about me during both of my cycles/pregnancies!!).