IVF #3 or more in July/August?


#3242

Fly - just checked the pics of you baby girl…Shes PRECIOUS!! soo cute and I cant believe those were the hospital photos. I had so much trauma from my labor that I decided against taking pics. The day we were being discharged Aniket was extremely fussy. Wish we did go with them. aww well.

Chica - I would like to pics of ur lil girl. Any chance you can upload them here for me :slight_smile:
Also my milk has come in and Aniket is feeding well. it is watery as well. I have an appt with the lactation consultant, we’ll see what she says in terms of his progress. I am also starting engorge…anyone else? it hurts real bad!!

AFM - will put pics up once I get to resize them. Right now time for a nap.


#3243

oh Anozi i am so happy to hear from you!! i was getting a bit concerned when you disappeared! i have a 2nd degree tear. it still hurts but is a lot better. keep using the water bottle and did ur dr give u a sits bath? it brings me relief plus its nice to have some away time frm baby even if it’s in the bathroom!!

I can’t wait to see your little boy!! You so knew it!! LOL I am so proud of you- bc seriously that many hours I would have said just cut it out already! I was dying at my 11 hours!! OYY at least you only had to push for a small amount of time! Not like my 2.5 hour MARATHON!!

As for the depression, I am so glad you mentioned it. I have also been feeling a bit depressed at times. and i recall very well the day my milk came in I had the highs and lows like crazy. it’s the hormones hon. We are all feeling it. and yes the IVF feels like a walk in the park compared to this! Also being home alone with Maya is something I always dreamed about but IT IS HARD!!! Sometimes I feel trapped bc she is so little and we can’t really go anywhere. Breastfeeding adds to the stress bc you are a slave to your child’s needs! and YOU are responsible for her. So I totally understand how you are feeling. As for the sleeping in bassinet thing- Maya is making progress for sure and has some nights she’ll sleep no problem in it other nights not at all. have u tried the carseat? especially after feeding it is helpful bc she has gas and the position of carseat helps her digest better. the flat back of bassinet or crib are not helpful for little babies’ digestion even though back sleeping is recommended for sids. Also make sure you keep swaddling tight tight and sshusshing in baby’s ear. Have you heard of the book, The happiest Baby on the block? It’s a great book especially for a crying baby. basically it says that babies have a 4th trimester where they need to get used to life out of the womb so its helpful to replicate life in the womb w tightness, warmth, and sounds. if u have time google the book.

I’ve also been depressed ab my body- esp after the epidural headaches i was getting. that w the tearing and breastfeeding is a lot for anyone to handle. it gets better though and i am so happy you have dh and ur mom to help.

last night maya was so fussy from 9-12 and i was exhausted. i had pumped some milk for her bc i have a dr appt today and dh will need to feed her. but since she wouldn’t stop crying and my boobs were dry i told dh to just give her a bottle. he did and she was fine after a while but i was seriously at my breaking point. Anyway I guess my point Anozi is that you can only do what you can do… Each day brings a new obstacle bc there is no consistency in their behavior right now. ur baby loves you and all that matters!

here are a fw pics


#3244

it keeps saying the files are too big to attach, sorry!

anozi ur not on Facebook? we all share pics privately there. you should join our group!!!


#3245

ahhh I guess I should just suck it up and join facebook lol. EVIL!
I am so happy to hear you are going through what I went through chica. On top of it all I had a tough time with my folks and dh. My mom was basically freaking out the entire time she was here. DH was sooo annoyed he said we need to change our birth plan because he did not want her in the room. I was caught between a rock and a hard place…but I agreed with him. She was upsetting me more rather calming me down. I felt so bad that she could come to the room…I still feel guilty because my dad and her were basically in the hospital lobby and cafeteria for hours. And later she was crying that she was worried about her baby!! I felt so bad that I find myself crying about it sometimes even now. I dont know how I could have fixed the situation!! But I think I will get over it in a few days…its still all new and I think about it often. I also feel like should I have just sucked it up and gotten the c section…rather than the vag drama and get this tear? My baby was also pulled out via forceps which was traumatized too. Sooo I do often keep going back to that day and rethinking about how I could have done things differently. :frowning:


#3246

Hi everyone:

Having a bit of a crazy day. Went back to the ped today for Allie, she gained her 1 oz but her bilirubin levels keep increasing. She is considered jaundiced. They arranged for a home health aid to come to my home and bring a portable ultraviolet light machine. So she is on the machine to try to help bring her levels down. If they continue to go up they will have to admit her to the hospital.

So far she is having a really sleepy day and the warm lights feel good. The machine is soft so she is sleeping on it without a problem. I see her having a great deal of difficulty laying on this thing later tonight but hope it won’t be too bad. We go back to the ped tommorrow so they can check to see what her levels are doing.

In the meantime, I am so freaking engorged. I was engorged yesterday when my milk came in but Allie wanted to be connected to my breast all night so she drained my boobs. However now this afternoon she is tired and can’t stay awake more than a few minutes and I am so dying. I ordered a breast pump but I won’t have it until tommorrow. I wanted to wait until I knew I would have breast milk before I ordered a pump.

Any suggestions? I get nothing with hand expression.

Anozi-- I agree with Chica. You have to do the best you can do. I am not depressed at all, I am really really enjoying my baby but I find myself completely irrationally stressing about everything. Am I starving her? Is she getting enough milk? Am I spoiling her? Is she going to be safe in the car seat? This is totally crazy, I know. We all have our total mental issues right now. LOL


#3247

[quote=artchickadee]Fly- I LOVE the pics- she is beautiful, just like you. Love all that hair on her! And the song was perfect to the slide show. So glad your milk is in. Yay momma!

Congrats Anozi! Sounds like it was a long process but worth every step. I hope you post pics soon too!

Adelaid- Thanks for the info, it is still up in the air but I think I am scheduling my c-section this week for the week of June 18th. In the same boat as you, I also have a low lying placenta but it seems to be moving a bit.[/quote]

Artchick, it is almost your time!!! Keep us posted on yoru c-section date.

Have you chosen a name for your LO.


#3248

Anozi honey you absolutely did the right thing by kicking your mom out if she was stressing you out!! Omg the whole experience was so traumatizing and added stress does not help. Please do not feel guilty!! I was a college and total lunatic psychopath irrational ***** to dh and my delivery nurse. I felt like such an idiot afte and apologies 10 million times over but you know what when you are the one pushing a 6-7lb ball out of ur torn vag with a freaking tool after 40 effing hours of pain you can do whatever the hell you want!!! I’m sure ur mom understands and if she is giving you grief than tell her to leave ur house bc you do not need added stress in the first week!
Also I’m sure ADe and Erin will tell u about c section recovery! ADe had a problem w stitches right?? Our vag is torn and it hurts but I’m telling you it heals quick. Now 2 weeks postpartum I feel a lot better. Not 100% but def more mobile. Keep using squirt bottle!
This is the exact reason we said no visitors in room during birth and told my mom no when she offered to stay w me at our house when maya came home. We need to figure it out in our own.

It will get better, I promise. Also have u gone out? I didn’t for 11 days (except dr) and now that I have done a few mundane tasks like food shopping I feel so much better! a friend gave me that advice when I was like 36 weeks and she just had her baby. She said even if for 15 min walking around CVS w/o buying anything u have to get out! I laughed at her then but totally understand her now!!

Fly sorry to hear aB Allie and jaundice. How long does she need to be in light machine? As sleepy as she is try to empty ur breasts by feeding her. I usually can squeeze milk out (drops) by hand. But def not enuf to get me relief! Hope the pump comes soon. Do u have bottles??? Also try ice packs on them or even a hot shower might get u to let down some milk.

Had a pretty good day- starting to get some sort of routine which is key for my recovery.mY sis came over w the absolute cutest outfit and headband for maya! I can’t wait to dress her up! I saw my OB for just blood work since I’ve had elevated thyroid in pregnancy and I am taking meds. I also asked him to look at my incision tear to make sure it looked normal. He said everything looked just fine but it can take some time to heal. That made me feel much better. See anozi I totally understand ur frustration!

Fly I have the same ones as u too worrying if maya is getting enough milk and if she’s breathing!! Lol but I feel in my heart that I am a good mom Si that brings me peace.

I am having an issue w my mil tho telling me every 2 seconds her “suggestions”. I didn’t want to apPear ungrateful bc she has been helpful but she is very intrusive and made me cry on mom’s day by making so many “suggestions” I was feeling like I was doing everything wrong! I told dh I need a break from his parents bc I’ve seen them every single day since m was born and it’s just too much for me!! And I do not feel bad either- I need to do what is best for me and my baby right now!


#3249

Anozi-congrats Mama!!! So happy your little boy is here! Like the other woman have said, everything you’re feeling is natural. Please don’t 2nd guess yourself, you just have to move on. I would definitely say the c-section sounds easier than actual l&d but recovery is a b*tch! Hopefully your tear heals quickly. I also had feelings of depression, especially regarding not being able to get E to BF. Once I finally made the decision to pump only and bottle feed the breast milk, I felt much better.

Art-I hope your placenta moves!!! It would be a lot easier to take care of E if I could move around better and sleep more comfortably. It’s been two weeks now and I’m finally starting to feel better!

Fly-the warm shower might loosen it up enough to be able to express by hand. Yesterday I took a shower right before I was due to pump and it was dripping out of me! Hopefully Allie’s bilirubin levels start going down soon! E was borderline but he’s doing much better now.

Chica-my MIL is here with me this week and I thought it was going to be tough. Luckily she’s been ok. The hard part is she has been hogging E all day! It does let me get stuff done around the house though. She’s actually due here at 8:30 so I’m going to catch a couple more z’s before she gets here!


#3250

hi ladies. sounds like we are alldealing with the same issues. I was siper sad and weapy the first two weeks but it got better. I think the responsibility of feeding helping them grow, getting them to sleep, the lack of sleep and of course the hormones cause the stress. my DH has been out of toown so i am doing the nights alone and i was freaking about the girls making noise and then about them NOT making noise.

I got the book “Baby Wise”. Good friend of mine used it and got her second son to sleep by 8 weeks and her twins to sleep at 11 weeks. So I think it works. Basically it says to feed them, play with them, then let them sleep. Do this every 3 hours during the first 8 weeks and the focus on getting a full feed (20 minutes at the breast) and put them to sleep awake so they can learn to sooth themselves. The parts I find hard are that my girls often fall asleep while burping and are not awake like they should and then when they are awake they play for the whole three hours and then fall asleep right before they should eat again. That and my mother and mother in law like to hold them and snuggle and not put them down to nap. But we are working on it. It is a good idea and other people said it works.

Anyway. Off to feed the girls. More later.


#3251

I’ve heard of baby wise. the book I’m read is 12 hours by 12 weeks. same premise but gives a few more weeks!

mayas problem is she is a “snacker.” at night its not so bad but to get 20 min of feeding it takes an hour! 10 min feed then burp, rest, chg diaper, feed again, rest, swaddlem, shhhh

it’s exhausting! but i am getting used to it bc then she’ll sleep 3-3.5 hrs uninterrupted. she’s usually wide awake when i put her back down. she also needs to be swaddled very tight- calms her!

e went for a walk today in her stroller! it was hot- 7 or so! felt great to get out though!

oh also her stump fell off this am!!! underneath there is all this dried blood. i tried to clean w just a cotton ball and water but I’m scared!!


#3252

oh yea fly do u know if you buy pics off 365 if they give you the rights to the pics?


#3253

[QUOTE=Erintobe]hi ladies. sounds like we are alldealing with the same issues. I was siper sad and weapy the first two weeks but it got better. I think the responsibility of feeding helping them grow, getting them to sleep, the lack of sleep and of course the hormones cause the stress. my DH has been out of toown so i am doing the nights alone and i was freaking about the girls making noise and then about them NOT making noise.

I got the book “Baby Wise”. Good friend of mine used it and got her second son to sleep by 8 weeks and her twins to sleep at 11 weeks. So I think it works. Basically it says to feed them, play with them, then let them sleep. Do this every 3 hours during the first 8 weeks and the focus on getting a full feed (20 minutes at the breast) and put them to sleep awake so they can learn to sooth themselves. The parts I find hard are that my girls often fall asleep while burping and are not awake like they should and then when they are awake they play for the whole three hours and then fall asleep right before they should eat again. That and my mother and mother in law like to hold them and snuggle and not put them down to nap. But we are working on it. It is a good idea and other people said it works.

Anyway. Off to feed the girls. More later.[/QUOTE]

I ordered that book a few days ago! Just waiting for it to come in now. E is almost always awake at night when I put him down. During the day it varies.

Oh and randomly I think I have a clogged milk duct already!! After my last pump I noticed one side of one of my boobs was swollen and sore to the touch. I took a hot shower and now I’m trying to pump to clear it out. I hope it works!!!


#3254

Things are good here. Allie’s bilirubin levels went down. She is still a little above normal so she has to stay on the lights today and tommorrow. She also gained 4 oz in the last 24 hours. :clap: I feel like my prayers have been answered in overflow there (literally) as I couldn’t breastfeed my previous DD at all. I realize that I am also engorged because I am just making more milk than I think my LO can drink. Hopefully my pump will be here today and I can start resolving that issue. Icing my boobies definitely helped and then I apply heat right before I BF which I think helps her get the milk out more efficiently. If she keeps gaining weight at that rate she will be one chunky monkey in the next month.

Allie has been an absolute angel on the lights. The bed is soft and the warm lights seem to make her sleepy. Also, now that my breast milk has fully come in, I think she is more content now that her belly is full.

Anozi–You did the right thing by leaving your mother out of the delivery room. I didn’t even allow my Mother to come to the hospital!!! until after the baby was born because I just could not take it. That time was all about you and your DH’s feelings definitely trumped Mom, its his baby too.

I had a 3rd degree tear with my DD and 1st degree with this baby. It really is not going to take as long to heal as you think. Chica is right about the sitz bath, total life saver, do it a couple times daily if you have to. Also, did they give you the pads with ice…really helps. YOu will be feeling more like a human being in another week or so for sure.

As for the books–I am skipping them. Minus the breastfeeding until they reach first grade part I think I am a total attachment parenting kind of Mom. I think your instincts as a Mom will help your baby adjust to you.

Chica I am not sure about the pics. I ordered a package from them at the hospital and a DVD with the photos.


#3255

Fly - try ice packs and also my lactation consultant said that a cabbage leaf on engorged breasts really help. I know odd. it smells bad but does the trick.
The Cabbage Cure for engorgement
My armpit has a rather large breast tissue that has swollen from all the milk, and I started doing it since yesterday. hope that helps!

Chica - I know my mom was so worried that she could contain herself. I think my guilt/concern of the labor day will pass with time. I have my beautiful baby boy to enjoy now :slight_smile:

AFM - are any of you ladies taking stool softners so you dont have to put pressure when you go? I on colase and I am afraid to put any kinda pressure with the scare of stitches tearing. Also Fly…how long did it take for you stitches to heal the first time around? just curious.
Aniket was born 6lb 12 oz. He lost weight and he was about 6lbs5 the day we were leaving the hosp. He had his first appt on monday with the ped and he was 6lbs 2 oz. The dr said that he will have probably peaked at that point and should be gaining his weight back. He latches on well but I constantly have to nudge him to continue drinking since he always falls asleep at the boob! He latches on for 20-30 mins total. Yesterday at the lactation appt he had already gained oz back but he didnt gain much after the feeding at the appt. He did poop well and she had to change his diaper lol. So far it all looks like its going normally but next mondays appt will be our tell tale if he is really eating well. Im nervous I hope he is!! because I feel like a cow!!


#3256

Hi ladies,

I am so sorry to have gone MIA, but I have been thinking about you… And now catching up. So glad to hear everyone’s stories, and definitely relate a little bit to each of you!

My twins were born 5 weeks ago, April 9.Ironic they came the first day of my scheduled maternity leave, although I was supposed to have a few more weeks to prepare! I had been have braxton hicks nonstop, then the real deal started - and baby a being breach went straight for a csection. They were born at 35 weeks; our girl completely healthy but only 4 pounds 6 oz. Our boy was big (6 pounds even at 35 weeks!) but his lungs not mature and he spent 10 days in the NICU. The first days were very hectic, taking care of a preemie newborn at home, getting family to babysit to run back to the hospital to see our little boy, dealing with depression big time (feeling all kinds of guilt about them coming early and having issues, although I know is not my fault…). So now 5 weeks out we are finally settled into a routine. And we have hired someone to help 5 hours a day during the week while DH is at work - I don’t know what I was thinking before that I could do it all on my own with twins, especially when the friends and family visits slowed, but it has been a godsend to have her extra set of hands around here!

Feeding has been a drama all on its own. Am bf but also supplementing with high calorie formula every other feeding due to low birthweight and my supply. Our girl latches well but I still worry about her weight since she was so small to start with and constantly wonder if she has enough, even now. Our boy had problems latching since he was on oxygen support the first days of life and I couldn’t feed him, so I finally gave up and also pump and bottle feed him (breastmilk every other feeding). Its been a bit exhausting but worth it - they are now healthy and weigh almost 9 pounds and over 7 pounds - considering my 40 week due date was last Saturday I consider that pretty good!

So that’s my quick update on 5 very busy sleep deprived weeks! Will try to be on more often for updates and to catch up with you all… Just wanted to post this so you all would know I didn’t drop off the face of the earth! Would love to also catch up with you on Facebook- can someone let me know how to find you all?

Wishing you all the best!


#3257

Oh alf I am so haPpy to hear from you! And congrats on your twins! We all figured you had them but nevertheless I’m glad you came on to share your story. I too had my little girl on the 3rd day home from work, and Erin on her first or second! They knew how badly we wanted them I guess!

I am also glad to hear your daughter’s weight is up and your son is home and healthy! My friend w twins also had help as she too was bf both and has a 2 year old! You made a smart choice hiring help. Sounds very hectic all the feeding and pumping, but you are making it work so I totally aPplaud you! Bf a singleton is hard,so props to you for managing twins, even if you are supplementing. You have to do what you can.

I’m actually thinking of going to a bf support group at my hospital since miss maya is such a snacker. I was up each hour feeding her until 3 when finally I don’t know how she slept until 7. It’s getting really difficult and I feel like maybe my supply is affected since she latches 10 min at a time on a side. I’m just not sure if she is too young so I will call to see.

Anyway hope u all have a great day


#3258

Congratulations Alf!!! We were certain you had your babies and so glad to hear you guys are doing well. I hope you do join our FB group. I think Ade is the facebook guru, so I am sure she can help you with that. You are trooper with your twins and bfing. I have my Mom and some part time help and I only have one newborn (I have a teenager too but that is beyond the point) so I think it is great you have help with 2.

Anozi–Ha Ha!!! My DH is going to think I am crazy with the cabbage but I may just have to try it. I got my breast pump today…hmmmmm pumping is interesting going to take some getting used to but I have already started storing milk.

My DH personally sterilized the pump and then read the instructions to it, he can’t wait to feed Allie, he feels a little left out with the breast feeding. I wonder how soon I should allow him to give her a bottle? I introduced a pacifier and that did not seem to confuse her at all.

Also, I have 1 stitch this time, last time I had lots of stitches from top all the way down to rectum. I know that they tell you to give it 6 weeks until you are considered completely “healed” (in other words don’t run a marathon and no wild sex) and the stitiches are completely dissolved but honestly I felt much better (not 100%) but fairly good after about 2 weeks or so. I no longer needed ice or a sitz bath and I could go to the restroom without fear. How long did your Dr. tell you to take the colace? My OB gave me some internal rectal medication in the hospital (hopefully this is not TMI) which made things loose for a couple of days and then i went back to normal. I am not taking colace. I was a little afraid at first but it has been fine.

Chica–I am curious to know what you find out from your lactation support group. Is she snacking or is she cluster feeding? My lactation said that cluster feeding (wanting to east constantly, especially at night) is normal particularly around the time they are getting a growth spurt. It is nature’s way of getting you to produce more milk because baby is getting bigger. Allie was cluster feeding like crazy but now she is more normal. I have read that there is a growth spurt around 2-3 weeks, 6 weeks and 3 months. Maybe little Maya is just growing like crazy.


#3259

Maybe it is cluster feeding… All I know is today I made sure I didn’t feed for at least 2.5 - 3 hrs and she ate at least 10 sometimes more on each side! I had to coerce her the last hour w the pacifier but as long as I did she did great. Dh thinks I’m starving her but I’m not I just want her to eat meals! If she were starving then she’d be screaming!

Fly how is allie’s jaundice? I hope she doesn’t need the light much longer.

Anozi how is Aniket! And more importantly how are you? That friend who advised me to go walk around CVs stopped by today. It was good to talk to someone who understands how I’m feeling!

I didn’t go to the bf support group today bc maya and I fell asleep until almost 11 so it was too late. But I plan to go next week!

Dh and I are planning to have some wine tomorrow night! I’m so craving but I’ll have to pump and dump’


#3260

Ladies doing better as the days go by. Fly you are truly a god send. When I read that you had a third degree…i sighed with relief knowing that I can lean on your previous experiences. I am supposed to take colase for as long as I need. I am taking it 2 times a day since the birth. Its only been 9 days though so I am still afraid to put pressure. My mil has been feeding me these Indian dishes that are old school remedies for constipation and they seem to be doing the trick too. I agree the stitches are dissolving…from what I can tell in the sitz bath. But I still constantly feel pressure in my butt…wish my ob had given me something that would have loosened things up lol. btw we are all past the point of tmi lol! :grouphug:

Chica - Depression is all out. Now its just constant joy to play with Aniket. But also a slight fear about the pooping problem. but aside from that Im enjoying my days as a mom. Maya does sounds like she has a growth spurt or it could be thats her way of bonding with you - got that from the le leche league group. She just wants her momma :slight_smile:

Alf - so happy to hear from you. Glad all is well with your twins even after such a hectic start. Hope your lil girl gains her weight back and your lil boys builds his strength to become a strong lil boy :slight_smile:

Ade - Im telling you the cabbage trick really worked for me!! if nothing else try cold or hot compress and express milk it. I have been engorged on and off and my the gland in my armpit is a killer!! If that meant putting a cabbage in my armpit and going to bed to get rid of it then thats what I did lol.

AFM - Sooo tired. I finally got Aniket into bed by himself this morning!! for 40 mins!! yay. Progress. Dh and I were getting tired of holding hiim and sleeping in weird positions. I got read up more on how to manage his sleeping without body heat. I mean its ok its only 6 days but if this continues then we are doomed to have spondilities or sciatica problems later in life. Is that book baby wise helpful with how to get your baby to sleep by themselves. Chica - the swaddle advise is great…however he sleep well after swaddled if he is being held. The min we put him down his eyes fly open! ahhhhh


#3261

anozi im so glad you are feeling better as far as the depression goes. i knew you would!

try the carseat! maya loves- i think bc its like tight and upright like when she was in my belly! we put it next to our bed at night and altho we start her in bassinet, she always ends up in the carseat.

i agree w you- i think the snacking / constnt feeding is her looking for mom. the last 2 days have been much better prb bc now i am noticing it ugh more. plus i make sure to log every feeding session length so i know more or less what she’s getting.

i ordered birth announcements at shutterfly.com and thank you notes at vista print.com. i had 25% and 20% coupons so even though it costs almost $300 for all the stuff, at least I had coupons! Vista had birth ann. much less expensive but they seemed cheap… you get what you pay for, right?

anyway we had a nice walk again today and soon DH will be home.

when will you guys start taking your babies OUT?? I’m so bored already!!