IVF or surrogacy?


Hey. I am so sorry for you. I know it must be hard for you. I had 3 miscarriages and after that, I was not able to conceive. I went for treatments but failed. I also went for IVF but it failed in the second cycle too. I was upset. In the end, I decided to go for surrogacy. I am happy that I chose it. For it, I went to a clinic in Europe. Now I have a baby. I have no more worries in life. I am a happy mother. There is no difference in your own child and someone else birth given child. They both belong to the expecting parents. I hope you will understand.


Hi. How are you doing? I understand your concerns. I had them too. I’m a 40-year-old woman. I had my son through surrogacy a year ago. I had been TTC for three years and nothing happened. I had to go through so much. It was really hard for me. I really wanted a baby of my own. Surrogacy was the only option for me. It bothered me a lot that I couldn’t carry my child but honestly, you just get past it. When got to hold my baby in my arms he seemed so mine. And the connection I developed with him over the months can’t be compared. I know having myself would’ve been so much better but that’s okay. I’m way happy now.


Hey there. I’m really sorry to hear about what happened. I’d suggest you go for surrogacy, though. I see nothing wrong with it, to be honest. You want a baby, right? The baby will still be genetically, yours! What else could you possibly want? It’s a no-brainer, for me.


Hey! Even I am new over here. Sorry for the situations you are having.
Well, That’s how surrogacy works. And it’s for those who have lost all hopes for conceiving. So there is nothing to feel awkward. They are just making you able to have a baby.
If you would go for adoption, That baby won’t be biologically yours. But in surrogacy, this could be possible.
That’s completely up to you about what you want to go for.
As you have already three IVF failed. The doctors would never stop. They could try another one. But it’s up to you. Either you want to proceed or have a surrogacy procedure.


I guess surrogacy is the last option for me now to have baby of our own.
I have contacted many surrogacy related clinics and had gathered quite good info about surrogacy.
I also contacted some surrogates who are willing to cary our child in their womb.
I was pregnant thrice but had miscarriages every time.
I had many complications while getting pregnant.
During my first marriage i had no luck with having children although i conceived for 3 times.
I know today surrogacy is a common thing but i am worried about many aspects of having a baby via surrogacy.
I guess we will find a surrogate with the help of clinic we are consulting.


I’m happy about your pregnancy, although it’s tough for me a little. it’s a miracle you must know it. unfortunately, my miracle has gone. 2 days before my scheduled scan I had a miscarriage. I felt so high througout my 2ww, no bad signs or so, and was over the moon when I got bfp…all this disappeared in a moment. devastated, depressed. but still i’m here and thinking of moving on. not now of course, maybe in a month or two, but i’ll keep going to reach my dream. fingers crossed for you x


Hey! Julie here. Hope so you are doing well.
I just read your case and become very sad after reading your situation. It’s a big deal. I salute to your dare. You are a motivation for others who is dealing with such circumstances.
It’s a great option that you have chosen. There are some clinics I Europe that gives quality treatment. They have their surrogates. Expenses are also very reasonable there. You should also search for some clinics across Europe. I got many reviews about them. They are specialized for surrogacy. I think you should contact them. That’s my opinion.
All my sympathies are with you.


Sorry to hear about the failed cycles. You are a strong person hun. I am sure happiness will come to you. Now I have a suggestion for you. If you have your eggs fertilized then you can implement it. You can get them implanted in a surrogate mother. In this way, the baby will be genetically yours. I know you will miss out on giving the birth, But hey, You will get the baby at least.


Don’t worry dear.
There is a solution to every problem today.
If you are unable to have a baby from your own womb then why not you go for surrogacy.
Surrogacy is the most common method of having a baby with your own DNA.
Don’t lose any hope dear i’m also 43 years old and i have also no luck with kids.
I had many complications regarding pregnancy.I conceived for 3 times but resulted in miscarriages every time.So i also gave up on getting pregnant again and again.I researched over the web for different methods of having babies and i came across surrogacy.Surrogacy is a good solution for mothers like us who can’t have a baby of their own.While researching about surrogacy i came across a clinic many times.There are very positive reviews about it over the internet.
So i contacted the clinic and told them my complications they answered my all questions.They cleared my misunderstanding about the surrogacy.
So now i am ready to go for the surrogacy method.
I have persuaded my husband to go for surrogacy.He is ready if we can have a baby via surrogacy of our own DNA’s.
The clinic will find a good surrogate for our baby.
If someone has any review and suggestion please let us know.So that we can learn from you.


I’m sasha from Japan. We are settled in Japan from last few decades.
I had hysterectomy cancer. All of you should know its treatment and its result.As a result i was cancer free but for the lifetime i’m infertile now.So i was worried and tensed and than my husband came to know about surrogacy.Surrogacy is a method of raising a baby from someone’s else egg. I was amazed at this method but when i studied about it i was happy.Here in Japan it is totally prohibited.So we moved to Europe and roamed in Europe for sometime and contacted many clinics there, Than we heard about BioTexCom and we moved to Ukraine. It is a very good clinic and we consulted them.
They are the best they have best solution for us now.
Then we found a surrogate mom and we donated the eggs and now surrogate is carrying our twin daughters. Now when i sit alone i thank god that he is giving us two gifts in one time. We are so happy and excited to have our babies.
Please share your stories with me.


Hi there @Rihana966. I hope you are doing fine. I am really sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine the pain you must have gone through. Infertility is really a humongous issue. Yes, Surrogacy is definitely a blessing. I am infertile too. I also had my baby through surrogacy. It is a really great method for anyone who wants to have kids. surrogacy is banned in Japan? Hmm, I am shocked. I don’t know what is wrong with people. It is 2018 and people still frown upon such actions. I am really glad that you had success with surrogacy. I hope your kid brings you lots of joy.


Hey, Welcome to this forum. Our forum provides you a better suggestion. Dera I feel very sad to hear about You BUt the good things is that you do not lose your hope. You try to move on in your life. Life does not stop. The everything should be better. Everything takes her time and must be better for us. But depression and lose hope in not the solution of any problem. You choose surrogacy. Dear surrogacy makes you able to see your own biological child. It is not a dream it is a reality. Through surrogacy, many peoples have their own child. Couples who can not conceive naturally. Enjoy their child life through surrogacy. Surrogacy in the blessing for all those couples. Who lose all hope in their life. Best of luck


Hey, Welcome to this forum. Our forum provides you a better suggestion. Dera I feel very sad to hear about You BUt the good things is that you do not lose your hope. You try to move on in your life. Life does not stop. The everything should be better. Everything takes her time and must be better for us. But depression and lose hope in not the solution of any problem. You choose surrogacy. Dear surrogacy makes you able to see your own biological child. It is not a dream it is a reality. Through surrogacy, many peoples have their own child. Couples who can not conceive naturally. Enjoy their child life through surrogacy. Surrogacy in the blessing for all those couples. Who lose all hope in their life. Best of luck


Hello!!! Welcome to the forum. Yes this forum gives you positive suggestions. Provide you benefit. Hope through this forum you must be able to do best decision. I know your problem is so risky.I know how people deal. They think that you are sinner and show you your all arrogance. But you do not feel bad. There is a reason why you went through. You know your condition is just like my aunt. She is also seven years married women. She faced many problems and hardships. She separated with her man. And now she got married second time at age of 40 but still the problem is as same as before. She trying to conceive and visited doctors and apply every formula on herself. The doctors refers her the new technological methods (The new scientific techniques surrogacy methods). After that she was very stress and think about it . She also discuss with her husband and also with me. As, I said her that you just have two paths. In the one, in which you will be-be happy for a lifetime else you wait for a miracle. I convinced her that you have guts and her husband also agreed with this method. She agreed with surrogacy. After her treatment, she blessed with baby which is about 5 years old now. So don’t lose hope if a science gives you a chance. I think you also have to avail it .


It is not something great to hear from a desperate parent. You must have been longing for the best in life. It often happens that things don’t go the way they should be. It is all destiny that is playing the game with your life. We never know what is best for us. Your failure in IVF does not mean that life has come to an end. The road to good luck is still open. Surrogacy can be real alternative. You are just scared because you think that you might not be able to feel the sheer joy of being a mother. Remember for some good you have to experience some worst in the life too. It is the same situation. Motherhood cannot be categorized. You must think that motherhood is an inner feeling. You feel great love for those who don’t even belong to you. This baby in the surrogate has at least some you in it. You will experience every move. You will see the baby scans.If I summarize you will share the joy of pregnancy. I hope my non expert opinion would be able to help you in making the right decision of your life. There are numerous blessings waiting for you.


Hey there!!!.i really feel depressed to see your thread. I can understand the pain you are going through. Indeed surrogacy is an amazing process. it is a very great blessing to start a family of your own. I was also an infertile woman. I wanted babies badly. I went for IVF but wasn’t able to conceive. but I it did not work for me so I gave up. I went for surrogacy. I am enjoying a happy life now. wish you all the best.


Ukraine is a good choice I’m sure. Other European countries either prohibit surrogacy or allow surrogacy agreements only the surrogate is unpaid. For those countries that allow surrogacy the laws typically give all parental rights to the surrogate. This is so until a court process can transfer the rights from her to the IP. In these countries the surrogate has the right to keep the baby if she chooses. But this will never happen in Ukraine. Surrogacy there is well regulated. Surrogacy contracts are considered enforceable under legislation. Under Ukrainian law, the child belongs to IP from the moment of conception. Once the baby is born, the birth certificate is issued with the names of the IP. SM is not awarded any parental rights. She has no standing to keep the baby or claim any rights. This is true even if there were no biological relation between the child and IP. In this and other cases their names remain on the birth certificate. Among other benefits is that Ukainian surrogates are usually between 25-35 years old. She is a natural mother of at least one child. She’s mentally and physically capable of becoming a SM. Her marital status is irrelevant. I’m saying this because in the UK for example one should be aware of so called Mother’s & Father’s rights. Among those: The woman who gives birth is always treated as the mother in UK law and has the right to keep the child. Even if they’re not genetically related. However, parenthood can be transferred by parental order or adoption. Surrogacy contracts aren’t enforced by UK law, even if you’ve a signed deal with your surrogate and have paid for her expenses. It’s illegal to pay a surrogate in the UK, except for their reasonable expenses.The child’s legal father or ‘second parent’ will be the surrogate’s husband or partner unless: legal rights are given to someone else through a parental order or adoption. The surrogate’s husband or civil partner didn’t give their permission to their wife or partner. If your surrogate has no partner, or they’re unmarried and not in a civil partnership, the child will have no legal father or second parent unless the partner actively consents. Seems so complicated, ahh. Imagine your surro’s partner is considered to be a legal father of your baby in the UK…Sounds really horrible to my ear!! So judging from those points I’m sure you both did right when chose Ukraine for surrogacy. God bless you with your bundle of joy soon!


Well I’ve read somewhere a dr suggests using ivf unless you’re strong & healthy enough and have money. For me, sounds really rough. You know, like a good try to loom your money. Though cases differ so much! For some people this journey is the hugest life challenge to battle. For others, this is a pure way of making money. I’m so glad we had the opportunity to have been treated not like ‘cycle’ but like ‘individual case’ at Biotexcom. This was a huge luck! Here’s some of my background. I’ve always been a promising architect putting all my strength & time onto career. So my infertility found me at the age of 40 yo (Probably sooner, but I’ve never happened to know about my issues before.) Dh was 42 yrs old. We got married in 2013. TTC since 10/14. Soon I was diagnosed on PCOS & blocked fallopian tubes. My AMH results came in <3.2. IVF 9/15 - failed. IVF 12/15 - failed. I never saw the faintest of BFP which was driving me mad. DR suggested PGD as he suspected me of being a carrier of Wilson disease - a very rare treatable disorder. Our further step was using donor eggs. It took us 2 shots to get prego with them. Though I’m sure I could continue trying with ivf if no luck. Sorrogacy was the last option to count on for both of us. Honestly, we even did a huge research on how the process was going to be just in case. So I’ve got so many things t share with ladies here applying for this option. All in all, ivf or surrogacy - this must be a mutual decision of the IP & their Dr whom they really trust. If he says there’s no possible luck with ivf & suggests surrogacy --then probably it’s time doing this…Everyone’s path is so individual. I’m wishing you the best with yours.


hello there. how are you doing now? i hope you are fine. I’m so sorry you had to go through a lot. maybe IVF is not for you. why on you go for surrogacy? a mother can never have a different behavior. after so much struggle. when you’ll finally hold your child in your hands. you will fee the most blessed. wouldn’t the be amazing? will you attitude be change? definitely not. don’t let negative thoughts stop you. you should go for it. Ukraine has many good clinics. Biotexcom is of them. my sister is under surrogacy there. they are working really professionally. take care. keep me updated.


Welcome to the forum. I am sorry to know about you. I empathize with you on your failures. May I ask some questions? Do you know the reason for those failures? have you consulted an expert for your condition? If yes, what did they say?
Although surrogacy is a great option to go with. It has helped many in need. And luckily I am one of those. I was diagnosed with unexplained infertility. But now I have my baby girl. We flew to Ukraine for our surrogacy. It was a wonderful experience. I wish you luck in future. Stay strong and positive. More power to you. Baby dust on your way.