Loneliness of Infertility


#1

Hey everyone! I was just wondering how many others find the process of TTC as lonely as I do? My hubby and I have been trying to conceive for almost 4 yrs now. Several cycles on femara and then climid, both unsuccessful. Now we were told our next option is injectables with IUI. We are not really telling anyone as my mom worries about everything and will think we have other things to be spending money on. However, I have had baby fever since I was about 15 (literally) and no words can express how bad I want a baby. Whenever I see someone else is pregnant or just had a baby or a baby in public or on tv I just want to bawl. Worse yet is when people ask me when we are gonna have kids or why we don’t have any, it is very disheartening. And I know my hubby tries to be supportive and I know he feels bad because he wants kids to, but I can tell he doesn’t know what to do or say when I am upset. I feel like no one understands and I have no one to talk to because all of my friends have kids and never had an issue. There are days when its worse than others but some days I just want to lay in bed all day and cry because it feels like all hope is lost. Does anyone else feel this way?


#2

Oh my gosh. I totally understand. My hubby and I have been trying ourselves for about 8 years. We got a doctor involved about three years ago and will be trying IUI for a third time hopefully in September.
It is a very lonely process. I find that the more I talk about it, the easier it is to figure out who you can talk about it with. I learned of others I work with going through similar struggles (although both have now conceived). But I have found that most friends find it uncomfortable to talk about. And my mom doesn’t 100% like the idea of IUI with donor sperm but she’s also desperate for grandchildren. And my husband tries but he is just deliriously hopeful and doesn’t worry like I do. So I really rely on these forums to communicate.
I wish the best to you. Feel free to join the September IUI thread. There are a bunch of awesome ladies over there. :wink:


#3

Oh hell yea I used to. But positive energy is a huge booster and definitely helps. I was reading Cynthia’s blog and she had a good post about what it feels like to be infertile, http://finally-pregnant.com/im-infertile/ but now she’s actually pregnant! I’m jealous but at the same time I have a lot to learn from her. She did it naturally and I’m doing those methods first before paying for expensive treatment. It may be an option down the road but I’m doing what the books say about the placebo effect.


#4

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#5

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#6

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#7

You should be free to share your story here. There are many people who are going similar situation. Do not give up. Others even try to conceive for more than 20 years. It will be hard at first. Since you are married and people are looking forward to see you with children. I can understand the society expectation. But do not let that ruin your inner peace. If you keep on crying it will not help anyhow. I tried to conceive for more than 2 years. But after my visit to Bio tex in Kiev, my IVF came in successful. I try to mean that anything is possible dear. Look in the positivity in life. I believe one day you will find a solution to your problem. Stop being mad at yourself. You cannot blame yourself for a mistake that you have not done. Learn to appreciate the small things that you have. Like a supportive husband. I know of some friend who divorced just because the woman did not conceive. So having a husband to still stick with you in such a situation is not easy. Find a good clinic that will tell you where the problem lies and start thinking of ways to solve it.


#8

You should be free to share your story here. There are many people who are going similar situation. Do not give up. Others even try to conceive for more than 20 years. It will be hard at first. Since you are married and people are looking forward to see you with children. I can understand the society expectation. But do not let that ruin your inner peace. If you keep on crying it will not help anyhow. I tried to conceive for more than 2 years. But after my visit to Bio tex in Kiev, my IVF came in successful. They are so good at what they are doing nd clients are overflowing that they are even running out of the 2018 economy packages. So better hurry up if at all you will need their services. I try to mean that anything is possible dear. Look in the positivity in life. I believe one day you will find a solution to your problem. Stop being mad at yourself. You cannot blame yourself for a mistake that you have not done. Learn to appreciate the small things that you have. Like a supportive husband. I know of some friend who divorced just because the woman did not conceive. So having a husband to still stick with you in such a situation is not easy. Find a good clinic that will tell you where the problem lies and start thinking of ways to solve it.