Hello everyone, My wife suggested i join a forum in order to vent my frustration.
I guess our story is that we have been trying for 2 years now and we have been seeing a fertility doctor for 1 year. Most of the initial tests were fine, there are no problems with me or my wife… the only thing of concern is her irregular periods. PCOS was a diagnosis given to us even though there we no cysts found. Regardless… we were given Clomid and have been on it since February. We had one cycle where it didn’t work and the doctor upped the dosage to 100mg. There came a point during the summer where we cracked. The stress caught up to my wife and she wanted a few months of not trying. Now we are back on our last two cycles of clomid before going back to the doctor. IUI is probably the next step.
This experience has been the hardest on myself i believe. My wife is strong and she believes that she will get pregnant. I however am pessimistic. I didn’t know i was until this happened. This is the last thing that i ever imaged that would happen to us. I am angry, angry at every pregnant women i see around me. We just happen to live in a new residential neighborhood where everyone is either pregnant or has at least one child. I’m not kidding about this… every house on my street. And if that’s not enough, there are constantly pregnant women at my work and my wife works at a doctor’s office where she sees many patients with kids or has to let people know that they are pregnant. And lastly all family members (except for two) are pregnant or have kids. Needless to say, we are surrounded by it and we keep seeing a :bfn: at the end of every cycle.
I guess i would be more optimistic about our chances if we had the money to afford IVF. At this point that isn’t even a possibility. To further in-debt ourselves would be irresponsible and stupid. All of this has made me angry and depressed. I wish i could let my anger go… i have tried but all it takes is one thing to bring it all back. I feel that no one is in our corner on this. My parents don’t know our situation but i know that they are indifferent if we have kids. My wife’s parents know our situation but her mother keeps making comments on how kids are a burden and we should just be happy that we are free to do what we want. Even our friends that went through IVF i feel that even though they use to feel like us… now because they have a kid they don’t care about our feelings.
I’m sure some of you probably have worse stories than mine… but this is ours and we’re all in the same boat. Hopefully someday we can all achieve our dreams. Feel free to comment or leave tips on how we can cope with this situation.