Lost. Really needs some advise


HI everyone, I am new to the group and have no idea where to start… So, here’s my info:
I originally started ttc in a previous marriage 10 years ago. I was told I have endometriosis, (had a lap in 2003). We were told to try for 3 months and it should work. Nope. Then I was put on bc for a year to stop any more adhesions from growing, and then a shot which put me basically into menopause (it’s been so long i don’t remember what it was) And that was the last straw. I gave up all hope, and ‘accepted’ the fact I could not conceive. Now I see it was a blessing in disguise, as we have since divorced but are still friends. He had his first child a year ago… I found my soul mate 6 years ago, and we have been ttc for the last 4 years. He is the most supportive, sensitive loving man I could ever have hoped for. He is willing to do whatever it takes for us to become pregnant. I had an HCG done in Dec. tubes are open and clear, everything looks ‘perfect’ according to the dr. Decided to move on and see a new Dr at a new clinic as mine just did not show an ounce of compassion, care or even that he wanted to help us. We started 50 mg Chlomid in May and June, took a break July & August, back on Sept and Oct, Nov upped to 100 mg. No luck. Just seen Dr again yesterday to re-evaluate, and he suggested we take a breather for a couple months, relax, de-stress, and start fresh with Letrozole. I feel like taking a ‘break’ is quitting. I just want answers. More tests, something, ANYTHING. If I was diagnosed with unexplained fertility because we’ve tested for this and that and the other, FINE. But this is what we know: DH has normal SA (low end of normal, but still normal) I DO ovulate. High progesterone count. My periods are very regular. I may or may not have endometriosis. Blood work seems fine. So it appears everything is fine, but clearly it is NOT. I know I am stressed. And we can’t afford much at all… Making our house payment each month is a struggle, BUT I will not allow money come between our dream. Maybe a breather will help. I just don’t know anymore. I am so confused. If any one has any suggestions, please help. :grr:


[FONT=Comic Sans MS]First, :grouphug: . I’m sorry you are having to go through this. It’s not an easy process, but you will soon learn that you are stronger than you ever imagined.[/FONT]
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]I don’t know how old you are, but if you are near you mid -thirties and up, I wouldn’t wait if I were you. I regret waiting as long as I did, as it is has been a long road of agressive treatments. [/FONT]
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]You may want to seek out another opinon of an RE and let them know that you want to be agressive (but safe) in your attempts to have a baby. If money is a factor, let them know that as well - sometimes, while IVF is more expensive than IUI, if IUI didn’t have a high chance of success for you, or multiple IUIs would be needed, the cost of those can add up quickly and end up costing as much as an IVF cycle (especially if you do IUI with inejctibles). Also, if they find that your eggs are an issue (lack of or quality), you could pursue donor egg or donor embryo.[/FONT]
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Good luck![/FONT]


I fully understand the point of taking a break and getting your stress levels down but if you absolutely feel like that is not an option for you make it clear to your RE. If he doesn’t agree and you are still not convinced that a break is the way to go then it may be time to move on to a diffferent RE. However I’m sure if you express how you would like to be more aggressive and not take a break he will comply. After all it is YOU who is paying him for his service so you should determine when you want a break and if you want to stop treatment or not.


You may want to consider clinical trials if money is a factor. Go to clinicaltrials.gov and check it out. Currently we are traveling to Huntington fertility in California to participate in a pgd/pgs study. Our meds are costing only $10 a day. The cost of IVF is only $6900. There are so many options and programs out there. Don’t give up


Hello and welcome. I agree with the rest of the posters: you do what YOU think is right. The Dr didnt give you any solid reason to ‘take a break’, then why should you? The earlier you start, the sooner you can achieve your goal. Again, some people choose to take a break as the whole process can be very stressful, however that’s for YOU to decide not the DR (unless of course there’s a reason, eg after lap they want you to wait for a few months). Personally I’m a very impatient person and wouldnt waste a day. Also, your Dr wouldnt really know what you want unless you tell him. Just like I failed my 2nd IUI yesterday, called the RE’s office and they said he was going to order Clomid for me to try again (Ive already failed 6 cycles of Clomid). I told the nurse that I really wanted to try something different as I’d lost faith? in Clomid. She was reluctant, but after checking with the Dr, they agreed to try Femara this time. It may or may not work for me, but the point is: you have to voice your thoughts and most of the REs would respect that.
Sorry for such a long message… just tell him that you’re ready to roll! As for the finances, I personally think it’s better to start with an IUI as it costs WAY less than an IVF and since you have a chance of success with IUI, it maybe better to gamble and start off with the cheapest treatment and hope that you dont have to spend more on more expensive interventions like IVF. Best of luck and keep us posted :slight_smile: