Me:DOR and DH:Very Low Counts and Motility...feeling pretty hopeless


New to this website so HELLO!!! I was just diagnosed with DOR (AMH was .5) yesterday. Totally devestated.
:’( DH has extremely low count and motility. He is currently on Clomid and Dr. wants me to start taking DHEA. Dr. told me only option is IVF w ICSI and SOON, like within 6 months! Financially it really isn’t going to work for us as my levels require a higher dosage of medicine, giving us an estimate of $20-25K for one cycle with only a 40% success rate of live birth. Assuming (aware that it isn’t likely but praying) the Clomid raises his counts and motility, has anyone out there gotten lucky with a natural conception or IUI with both partners having such infertility issues? :grr: :grr:


Hi there,

I can only imagine what a discouraging day this was for you. I went through a period where the doctors thought I had DOR and it was absolutely terrifying. Adding in male factor just adds the icing on the cake. Hugs!!

First of all, your AMH isn’t super terrible. I’ve seen women with .1 get pregnant on here, so there IS hope. How bad is your husband’s count? Has he been tested more than once? My DH had poor morph at one test, but it was fine a few months later…those things vary from test to test, and “borderline” numbers can be okay.

If you have DOR, I understand why they are rushing you to move quickly. Would you ever consider doing embryo adoption? That would eliminate both you and your DH’s issues…but it’s a difficult decision and not necessarily one to jump to first. Yet, IVF is expensive and you also want to know you are spending that money with a high chance of a good outcome. It’s really a decision only you guys can make.

Again, sorry you are forced to deal with this kind of decision and I hope whatever you choose, it works out for you!


Hi! Thanks for the reply. Yes, it was a very discouraging day for me…sat it the car crying for 45 minutes before I could go back to work. I thought I was fine, but decided to get checked out since my DH was taking meds. Would be horrible to put him through all of that only to find I am damaged…which as it turns out I am…but he is going to follow through with his cycle of meds until the first check up to see if they are helping. My DH has taken about 5 tests at the specified times by his Dr and Urologist and they fluctuated a bit but all of them were low low low everything. They were just as bad two years ago when we first started looking into why we weren’t pregnant yet. :frowning:

After talking and looking at the money to be spent vs the odds of success…decided to just forgo that idea for right now and hope for the best at something natural happening…or…if his counts come up high enough after taking the meds we can try an IUI which is covered by insurance. From what I have read on here and other community boards, it seems like it is pretty few and far between when the first cycle of IVF actually is successful, which means we would likely go two or more rounds and that is just too much $$ than we have to spend right now. If only I could win the lottery, right? We don’t want to defy what our plan is by forcing something to happen that just isn’t supposed to be. If we are meant to concieve, I believe we will. Trying to be positive in that neither of us can do much about our situations except keep trying, live our lives and hope for a baby miracle. If not, we will just spoil the ones around us!

Thanks again! :slight_smile:


Don’t toss in the towel quite yet! Your situation sounds quite similar to mine and several other ladies I know! My husband and I were told we only had a 1% chance of ever conceiving on our own, and I had just turned 36. We had tried to conceive our first one for two years before this point. We thought/hoped we would get “lucky” but that doesn’t happen. You do need medical assistance. My husband and I couldn’t afford IVF and we were really stuck on what to do when I found a clinical trial being offered through the New Hope Fertility Clinic in NY. I thought it was a joke, but it was quite real. I sent in our information and we qualified! We had to pay for meds and travel, but the cost of the IVF procedure and any monitoring done in NY was covered by the clinic. It was still expensive, we likely spent $6,000 to $7,000 but that was WAAAAAYYY better than spending $12,500 locally not including the monitoring costs they never tell you about. In the end, we drew conventional, had eleven eggs retrieved and fertilized, five made it to blast and two were transferred. We became pregnant with twins, but sadly, lost one at seven weeks. However, our other little one has been thriving, has passed all the first and second trimester screenings, and we just found out, is a little girl! We are just about to 23 weeks, and are thrilled with her progress. She has now started to kick me, which is really cool! Long story short, look online for clinical trials, if you can find one that is near you, it could cut your costs in half to a third of what you would normally spend. It certainly did for us! And we had to pay for two rounds of meds, since the first time I was stimmed, I had a low response (only one egg), so they wouldn’t retrieve, but let me try again. We hope to return to NY with a healthy baby to try again for a little brother or sister next year. While this study has closed another one is opening that has clinics participating all over the U.S. They are studying the effectiveness of the drug gonal f in women doing IVF that are between the ages of 37-42. There may be a trial that suits you near your area. Don’t give up hope yet! PM (private message) me if you have more questions.