My TSH level is at 7. I’m getting it tested again this weekend


#1

Hi, I’m new here. I’m very depressed and want to give up on life. I have been trying to get pregnant for the past 15months. Recently found out that I have hypothyroid. My TSH level is at 7. I’m getting it tested again this weekend. I have an appointment with endocrinologist next week. I don’t have a job. I don’t have work permit to work in US. I have been without a job for 4 years I’m so depressed I don’t have any real friends. I have been extremely suicidal and have tried it twice. I so badly want a baby in my life. I’m so stressed out and this is causing other health issues for me.

What should I do? I’m going crazy. I really want to stop this pain.Please help me.


#2

Hmmm…

It sounds like you have a few other things going on in your life to wort out. If you don’t have a work permit in the US have you considered going home (wherever that is) and getting a job there? Or is there some way you can apply for a work permit? I don’t live in the US but based on my experience infertility treatment is very expensive and you won’t be able to afford to pay for it without a job. Also, it may be hard to afford things for your baby when its born if you don’t have a job.
Also, I don’t mean to cause offense here, but if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts and feelings perhaps that is something you need to sort out before having a baby. I understand that infertility causes pain and heartache, but feeling suicidal is not a normal reaction and that is something you may need to get some help with.
Good luck with finding work and you ttc journey.


#3

Hypothyroid is easily treated with medication so I’m sure the endocrinologist will be able to help with that.

As far as the suicidal thoughts, sounds like you really need to talk to a professional about that. Does your husband know you’ve been struggling with this? TTC can be very stressful but nothing is so bad to take your own life. Heavenly Father knows who you are. He loves you so much. His Son has felt everything you are feeling, the heartache, the depression, everything. They will help you get through this hard time in your life. Please get some help.

I’ll be :pray: for you and hope things will improve.


#4

Hi. I’m sorry to hear what you’re going through. I hope this will help. My husband told me if we can’t have a baby after trying IVF, then God must have not have it in His plan for us to have one. There is one thing I learn in my culture about God’s will whether it is good or bad to me is to accept it. My husband says he loves me the way I am without or with a baby. Perhaps you should talk to your husband about what you are feeling right now.

I am a green card holder by marriage to a US citizen. My advice as a non US citizen, go home (wherever that is) to your family. I feel happy when I see my family even though it’s just once/year and I think you will too when you see yours. Especially now that you’re having negative thoughts talking to your family will help.

Taking your life because you can’t have a baby is not worth it. Think about people who have lost their lives due to war, cancer, sick children who are now at the hospital wishing they could just be better and wish they could have their lives back to be with their family. You have a family that loves you back in your home
Country. Their hearts are already broken from missing you as it is since you live so far away from them. ImagiYne the look on their faces and their heart broken if one day you ever take your own life. Do you want them to have their heart broken and to have guilt for letting you live here on your own and not being able to help you? Just think about people back home that love you, your parents, brothers, sisters, and surround yourself with them.


#5

I agree with what the others have said about getting professional help. I would like to add that once you get your Thyroid under control that you will feel A LOT better and it will help with your depression. My TSH was not as high as yours and I had all of the symptoms of hypothyrodism. My family doctor failed to recognize this and wanted to put me on an antidepressant instead. When, I started seeing my RE, putting me on Synthroid was the first thing that she did. It made a huge difference. Your high TSH level could be a reason why you are not getting pregnant.

Good Luck to you!


#6

Hypothyroidism is one of the EASIEST things to overcome in the fertility game, I also had the same diagnosis back in September and my levels were brought under control in the next month. I got my first ever positive soon thereafter.

Please remember there is so much to life than having a baby, so many people that love you. I suggest you call a hotline right now, there are people there who are waiting for your call.

[B]National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK[/B]

Sending you a hug and heartfelt thoughts, know that we are all here for you!


#7

I can’t really say anything that the other posters have not already mentioned, but I just wanted to reach out and say, too, that I hope you seek out the help you need. When the stress of life becomes too much we have to rely on others. Think of your unborn baby and what you want to tell them in the future. How would you want them to know you handled a stressful situation. How would you want them to learn to handle them? Reach out - good family, good medical advice and most of all God will help you feel a great deal better. :grouphug: I pray you get to a healthy place soon and will get to experience the joys of bringing a life into this world. Take care!


#8

[QUOTE=Dee1983]It sounds like you have a few other things going on in your life to wort out. If you don’t have a work permit in the US have you considered going home (wherever that is) and getting a job there? Or is there some way you can apply for a work permit? I don’t live in the US but based on my experience infertility treatment is very expensive and you won’t be able to afford to pay for it without a job. Also, it may be hard to afford things for your baby when its born if you don’t have a job.
Also, I don’t mean to cause offense here, but if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts and feelings perhaps that is something you need to sort out before having a baby. I understand that infertility causes pain and heartache, but feeling suicidal is not a normal reaction and that is something you may need to get some help with.
Good luck with finding work and you ttc journey.[/QUOTE]

I ditto all of this completely. I really think you should seek professional help, infertility is tough, but by no means should you want to kill yourself. This is serious and I hope you see help immediately.


#9

Thank You so much for your support

Thank you all for your kind replies. My Husband loves me a lot and he knows that I have not been myself for the past few months. He is always trying to talk some sense into me and tells me not to worry about the unseen future. I will get my work permit in a few months after such a long time. I already got a couple of great job offers but I had to decline them because of my Visa status.

I’m feeling much better today. I stayed up the whole night yesterday thinking what to do and that’s when I posted this message.

We did go to two RE’s here in orange county and my new RE is Dr. Wong who told us that he doesn’t see anything majorly work with us. His suggestion was to get 2 IUIS and then IVF done.

He was the one who told me that I have hypothyroid and I should start Replacement Therapy ASAP. I have short periods(23days) and short luetal phase which do his understanding is because of my thyroid problem. I’m 28 and I really hate it when people say you are still young. I also have high cholesterol.

I have been praying a lot to god to show me the way. I wanted to go back to my home country but my husband doesn’t want to move back and I can’t live without him. Also medical facilities are not so good in India. Sorry for such a long post. Thanks again for all the motivation.

I hope one day I will be able to say that I love life.:flower:


#10

I would encourage you to talk with a professional, contact your local NAMI (NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness - Mental Health Support, Education and Advocacy) and call the national suicide hotline for 24/7 support: 800-273-8255.

There are people out there who care about you, talk to them.

Being depressed is not going to help with getting pregnant, so please go get the help that you need and then work on getting pregnant or adopting.

Hang in there, just know you are not alone!


#11

I’m sorry to hear of your sadness. I think most of of here have experienced some sort of depression associated with infertility, although it seems as if you have a bit more on your plate.

My advice to you is to try to work out your other problems first before having a child. When you desire a child more than anything it’s hard to believe that it would bring anything but hapiness; however, having children can bring a whole new set of problems.

Having a baby should compliment one’s life and make it all the better, not fix it. Please try to take care of yourself first. Try to find positive things and work out the bugs first. Don’t be afraid to get professional help, many of us here do.

Good luck to you!