Need Suggestions. What to choose, surrogacy or IVF?


Hey Everyone! Hope so you are doing good. I’m here to get some piece of advice about my cousin’s situation Actually, she is suffering from some kidney issues. Doctors declared her infertile. Doctors saying that it could be fatal for her to have a baby in her womb. She doesn’t know what to do now. She is so frustrated. Now she is looking for surrogacy or IVF. I have searched a lot for her. She needs your suggestion whether to choose IVF or surrogacy. Her decision might depend on your suggestions. All replies are welcome. Thanks in advance.


Hi Pitjulie19, I am fine. I hope you are also doing good. First of all i want to say sorry about your friend 's health. She must take care of herself. Her own life is more important than a baby. Today nothing is impossible. she must go for alternatives. Like IVF or surrogacy as you mention. Okay so, if we talk about It’s time taking process. another thing it not suits all women. Surrogacy is more efficient i think. As it has higher success rates. In Europe,There are many good clinics in this regard. your friend must go for surrogacy in my opinion.
All the best to your friend. All my sympathies are with you.


Hey pitjulie19. I’m good, thank you for asking. You’re doing a great job by helping out your friend. Yeah, the doctors are correct. There’s no point conceiving when the risk is so high. Trust me, it’s far worse because the mental toll is too high. I know I’ve had a couple of miscarriages. It’s the worst feeling ever. Assisted conception is something she should definitely consider. IVF is a great option, but again she’ll have to get pregnant herself. It could be dangerous. I think she should opt for surrogacy. It’s a far better option. It’s safe as well. Good luck to her with whatever she decided. Hope it works out!


I will suggest surrogacy because i have personally gone through it. Many people are talking about surrogacy here. I thought i should also share my experience with surrogacy with you people here.
I am from Japan and was happily married. I had hysterectomy cancer from early stage. I went for the treatment and i was cancer free. But this resulted in lifetime infertility. First 6 years of our marriage passed on happily roaming around the world. After 6 years we both felt the need of our children. But we both knew that i am infertile. So my husband decided that we will go through surrogacy to have a baby. Japan has banned the surrogacy. My husband contacted a number of clinics from around the globe. Than we moved to Europe. In Europe we stayed for 4 months. But we didn’t found a satisfying clinic. After 4 months we moved to Ukraine. There are many clinics regarding surrogacy. We picked a good clinic. The clinic started our process soon and all things went well. The clinic found a good surrogate for us. Now the surrogate is pregnant with our twin daughters. The clinic and the surrogate made our dream come true of having a baby. If someone is looking for some good clinics for surrogacy. You should surely go to Ukraine for it.


Sorry to hear about your cousin’s kidney disease. It can get extremely frustrating. However, tell her to not lose hope. Although I am no professional my advice would be to opt for surrogacy. I am only saying this because if the doctors are saying that conceiving would be dangerous than I am sure that applies to IVF as well. During IVF she will have to take a lot of medications which might have their side effects on her current condition. Other than during surrogacy the baby will be hers, however, just growing in a more safer womb. This way her and the babies safety will be ensured. For both these procedures, it is really important that you visit the right clinic. Doctors need to be experienced and professionals. Therefore, tell her to research on her own as well. For surrogacy make sure that the clinic is operating legally. They need to be well structured and organized. The clinic I know about does call you for the first free consultation meeting so during that you can ask them for suggestions as well. Good luck!


Hey there! I hope you are doing fine. We are doing good. I think she should go for Surrogacy. Surrogacy is a great method. It is a blessing in disguise for infertile couples. I am sure it will help her become a mother. Hope all goes well for her.


This will totally depend with you. Depending on what you are actually suffering then finding the solution to the problem. Uterine abnormalities, such as fibroids that indent the endometrial cavity and endometrial polyps, can impair how the endometrium (the lining of the uterus) and embryo interact to lower implantation and pregnancy rates. These abnormalities can also cause irregular bleeding between menstrual cycles. Evaluation should be pursued by 6 months of attempted pregnancy in women with a known history of these abnormalities or a history of bleeding between menstrual cycles. The main approach to correcting or removing these uterine abnormalities is by hysteroscopy, a surgical method by which a narrow scope with a camera is placed within the uterine cavity. Instruments can be introduced through the hysteroscopy, allowing the surgeon to remove or correct any anatomic abnormalities.


Purely the personal choice. but you should know that if applying for surrogacy you’ll have to meet any of the listed indications. Among those are the following:
– The absence of the uterus;
– Deformation of the cavity or cervix;
– Diseases in which pregnancy and childbirth may endanger a woman’s life;
– 5 IVF attempts (I believe this number changes within places)
– Structural and morphological, or anatomical changes in the endometrium of the uterus;
– Complex somatic diseases.
One of these diagnosis should be proved by your doctor.
Of course you should check with your local lawyer all the details of legalization of the baby in your country/state.
Then surrogacy legislation in countries might be quite contradictive. To take surrogacy in the US, for example. Waiting time for the first try is about 9 months. American law is very strict. At the same time it’s too loyal to the surrogate mothers! For example, surrogate mother during pregnancy has the right to demand anything from the future parents. Often it can grow into blackmail. It doesn’t stop even after a child birth!! 'cause under American law surrogate mother is allowed to keep in contact with the child!! This is one of common reasons why people don’t choose America for surrogate program. Plus cost is the highest in the world – around $150k. It’s too expensive! All costs have to be paid by parents. Like cesarean section, the cost of treatment rehabilitation, accommodation and food for surrogate mother.
On the other hand, Ukraine is a country with optimally balanced legislation. Relationship to the child is determined by the father of the child. According to the same principle executed documents to the baby. The cost of surrogate motherhood varies from 30k to 50 k EUR. The price unlike in the US includes the risks (like cesarean), food, accommodation, transportation, translator, and so on. The procedure for registration of a child is very simple. For most of the cases, passport for the child is given in Ukraine. In some cases it is necessary to draw up documents in their own country. The queue moves quickly due to a good mix of supply and demand. The average wait time varies from 1 month to six months. But the hugest factor of all is that the surro has no right to keep the baby after delivery!! IP’s names are on the birth certificate. The surrogate cannot claim any rights after she signs the contract. This makes the process safe for the IP. Make sure your clinic is a reputable one with high live birth success rates.
If we take IVF option the huge amount of work is laid upon your dr. He must study your med histories well, make you pass the required testings and then evaluate your chances. Unfortunately we aren’t the experts here. Those are just some of the hints which might be useul for you. Good luck and feel free for the details.


I’ve just shared this on another thread, so will paste here. Questions about surrogacy to ask the clinic on the list~
How long has the program been in operation? Does the program maintain a referral listing of previous client couples? Does the program recruit its own surrogates? Through what means? Will they work with a surrogate recruited by the couple themselves? How are surrogates expenses handled? Is there a cap on these expenses? Does the program offer medical screening of the surrogate? To what extent? Who does the screening? Does medical screening include an AIDS test of surrogate and her partner? Is gestational surrogacy (also called surrogate IVF, host uterus) as well as traditional surrogacy available? What are the costs of surrogacy (traditional, gestational or donor)? What is the fee payment structure? What are the financial obligations incurred by the couple? What is the payment schedule? How long are the surrogate’s medical records kept? Does the program offer psychological screening and counseling to all parties? To what extent? Does the program offer on-site medical services (insemination or IVF) or do they work with local physicians and hospitals? How many babies have been born through the agency/clinic’s surrogacy programs? To what extent is contact between the surrogate and the couple encouraged? (By letter, meeting face-to-face, on-going?) Can the couple be present at the birth? What type of legal counsel is offered to the surrogate and the couple? Does this include the drawing up of contracts?
The next serious thing to consider was contract conditions and fees. Some websites provide service and price info. Some don’t so you’ll have to email them. The prices are different. Conditions are different, too. My advice on it: when considering surrogacy fees, ask your consultant if the price is final and what extra fees are, if any? Also, consider the number of attempts they provide. It may be only one attempt (no matter own or donor eggs), several attempts or endless number of attempts. Also ask if medications are covered by your contract. What I’ve noticed, is that some clinics assign lower price, but then it will be doubled with costs of all medications needed. So please mind this.


It’s really great to see you’re this concerned about your cousin’s situation. She must be super lucky to have you by side. But we aren’t the experts here. So these are going to be just some presumptions. The first thing she should do is to meet the IVF specialist. During this appointment, the specialist will review the information she has provided. He will discuss any previous tests or treatments she has undergone. Once they’ve discussed and addressed any concerns or questions, they will recommend how best to proceed. It is also important to note that during the meeting, the IVF specialist may suggest carrying out certain tests to assess her uterus and ovarian function. Ovaries scan is very important though. Please understand that these are routine procedures and may be suggested to determine the best approach for her treatment. Once she’s had the initial meeting with the IVF specialist, she will be given medication that will suppress her natural menstrual cycle. This is to ensure that the medication used in the next stage will be more effective. The medication comes in two variations: A daily injection (which the specialist will teach her how to use). A nasal spray.
As I’ve mentioned above, the accessibility of the ovaries will also be determined. They will check for cysts in the ovary which might affect fertility. After this, the womb is examined to see whether the cavity where the embryo will implant is normal and the lining is healthy. 3D imaging of the uterus helps them to pinpoint any physical abnormalities that may affect implantation. This assessment is performed to understand the qualitative nature of the woman’s fertility. Not just how many eggs, but how healthy they are!! And how receptive will the womb lining be to implant an embryo. This is important for producing fewer but good quality eggs and fertilising them to produce a high quality embryo. No matter what treatment protocol she’ll be on she will need to have about 3 or 4 ultrasound scans from day 5 of the cycle to assess the growth of the follicles. And assess whether the endometrium is thickening up. Follicles as they grow produce oestrogen so she will have one or two blood tests to determine if the follicles are producing the appropriate levels of oestrogen. They also measure blood flow around the follicles. Good blood flow brings oxygen to the egg which increases the likelihood of a high quality egg being retrieved. And many other things to be outlined. I believe dr is the one to suggest the best option for your cousin. Tell her my best wishes and good luck.


Just wanted to add some statistics I’ve recently found on the internet~
Women Under 37
Women under this age only require a single embryo transfer. Doctors usually consider using two embryos only if the quality of one embryo is not high enough. In the third cycle, no more than two embryos should be transferred.
Women aged 37-39
Again, women within this age range should have a single embryo transfer. A double embryo transfer will only be required if no high-quality embryos are found. Similarly, no more than two embryos should be transferred during the third cycle.
Women aged 40-42
Women within this age bracket may have a double embryo transfer, if necessary. If any suitable embryos are left over, it is likely they will be frozen for future IVF attempts.
I personally passed a 5day transfer with 2 nice A grade blasts at bio texcom clinic. It turned out to be the best decision though, as one of my embies vanished. Another one stuck and developed into a healthy pregnancy. I’m currently waiting for the 7 wks scan. Hope things are going on well.