Need your help and advice


#1

Hello ladies! I’m Brenda, 32 years old. I faced the problem of infertility. I want to share my story with you and ask for help, for advice, for anything, which can help me to solve my problem. This is my last chance, cry from my heart. I want to be happy, want to give happiness to my husband. My husband and I have always been dreaming about children. We have been together for 12 years already, and all this time we’ve been trying to conceive a baby. 3 years ago we made it and we were so happy. We thought that finally our prayers were heard. But our happiness has lasted not for long. My stomach hurt, aching pain felt in the thigh, plus nausea and dizziness. The doctor told me that all these are normal for pregnant and I have no reasons to worry about. Later, the pain became unbearable. It turned out that I had suffered from internal bleeding, which doctors have not diagnosed in time. So on the seventh month of pregnancy placental abruption occurred. Doctors had to remove the fetus along with the uterus. This loss has knocked down my husband and I, we yearned for a long time, we are still not really recovered from our loss. But we decided not to lower our arms, we want to have children and happy family very much. Our friends advised us to try surrogacy, but it is forbidden in our country. But my husband and I are very serious about it. This is our last chance! I really beg you to suggest, maybe someone faced and knows, in which countries surrogacy is allowed, which clinics are better to contact. I will be very grateful for any information!


#2

Hello Brenda! I’m sorry for your loss, I know how it feels. It’s very nice you didn’t give up! I will share my experience with you and maybe it will help. I also faced the problem of infertility. My husband and I have got married when we were 26 (now we are 40), we decided to set aside kids issue for a couple of years and to take up our careers. But a terrible thing happened. I started to feel lower abdominal pain. I’ve lost 17 pounds for very short period of time, I felt exhausted and I was getting tired very fast. One night I woke up because of sharp pain in abdomen and found out that I was bleeding. I was diagnosed with cancer of the uterus, after which the uterus, fallopian tubes and ovaries were removed. It was a big hit for our family. My husband wanted a son very much, but I knew that I couldn’t fulfill his wish. I was afraid that my husband will leave me for another woman, who will be able to bear a child for him. And I began to look for ways and exits, clinics and doctors, I wanted to do everything to save my family. After a long search, conversations with friends and acquaintances, reading of articles and reviews in the Internet, we decided to focus on surrogacy. But in our country it is, unfortunately, very expensive and we couldn’t afford it. We began to look for clinics in other countries, we wanted to find the best doctors and, at the same time, affordable price. It turned out that this procedure is legal in Ukraine and there are a lot of clinics. So we took this chance. No we have a wonderful healthy boy, my husband and I are very happy and grateful. If you have any questions, don’t be afraid to ask, it’s better to talk with someone, who went through this, who knows everything for sure. I hope my story will help your family! I wish you good luck and I hope your dream of having a baby will come true!


#3

Dee, thank you so much for sharing your story! I’m very glad for you and your family! Could you please tell more details about clinics in Ukraine? What were your criteria in choosing the right one? Did you consider clinics in Russia? I know that surrogacy is legal there too and we were going to visit some clinics there. Sorry for so many questions, we really want to find the best clinic, which can help with our problem.


#4

[I]Hello girls! It’s nice I found this thread. I think together we’ll figure out, where is better to make our dream come true! I understand you better than anyone else. I want to have kids, but I can’t. I’m 44 and my husband is 57, so we have no time to waste. Now we are in search of good clinics with positive reviews. We consider India, Russia and Ukraine. All of them have both pros and cons. Talking about India, we’ve read a lot of negative reviews. For example, some clinics do not give any information and guarantees, that a surrogate mother is fully healthy and will bare a healthy child. Also there are a lot of hidden fees. We’ve read a review from a couple, who said that they were given one price in the beginning and then they eventually paid almost 3 times more. Furthermore that clinic was looking for surrogate mother more than half of the year. Considering Russia, the main fear is the Russian law ‘A surrogate mother is an actual mother of a child’. It means surrogate mother can leave our child to herself. Now we are more inclined to Ukraine. The legislation in Ukraine differs from Russian and they don’t have such law, but there are a lot of scammers and fake clinics, so we are afraid to encounter with them. [/I]


#5

[I]Dee, may I also ask you some questions? What is the name of your clinic? Why did you decide to choose exactly that clinic? How was the service? Nowadays it’s really hard to find clinic with professional doctors and good staff. We want to find clinic, which will help us with the whole process, because we’ve never been to Ukraine and we don’t really know, how to get to the clinic. It’s very easy for foreigners to loose in absolutely strange city, especially with a language barrier. [/I]


#6

Brenda, I will gladly answer to all your questions! As Gloria said, there are really a lot of clinics in Ukraine and a lot of cheaters among them. But we’ve found a lot of good reviews about our clinic in the Internet. Also my colleague at work told me, that her friends visited clinic in Ukraine a couple of years ago and surrogate mother carried a baby for them. So I asked her to give me their phone number to talk with them about this clinic. They told me about BioTexCom clinic. They were very satisfied with the process and the result. So after our conversation my husband and I contacted manager of the clinic by mail. We thought that it will take long time to get the response. But in a couple of days we received a letter from the clinic with the questions to clarify the required info about my medical history and they also needed our marriage certificate. After they got all required info we appointed date of our meeting with the doctor. Our main criteria were an affordable price and success rate. We considered Russia, but the fact, that they have a law, which says that surrogate mother is an actual mother, put us on guard. Also there was an incident, when surrogate mother left child to herself and blackmailed couple, it was in the news. That’s why we decided to concentrate on Ukraine and we never regret. We were met at the airport by taxi driver. Also we were provided with accommodation and transportation. By the way clinic covers food supply. The clinic also provided us with English speaking manager.


#7

Hello Gloria! Please ask whatever you need! I will try to answer as accurately as I can. The name of the clinic is BioTexCom. They have a website, where you can find all prices and terms. As I’ve mentioned already, we talk to friends of my colleague, who had an experience with this clinic. Also I’ve found a lot of good reviews in the Internet. And of course, I liked that they have packages, which include all necessary services, so you pay single price and no more. The service was good enough. The clinic provided us with a taxi and taxi driver met us in the airport. Also they provided us with accommodation and food. All these were included into our package, so there was no need to pay extra money.


#8

[I]Thanks Dee for response! I’ve heard and read a lot about this clinic! I will definitely visit their website, thanks) Was it hard to communicate? Do they have interpreters? My husband is joking, that we should learn the Ukrainian language to go there) Jokes aside, but will their doctors be able to explain everything for us to understand properly? I’m afraid there will be misunderstandings, which will cause a lot of troubles in future. Sorry for so many questions)[/I]


#9

Gloria, we have same thoughts and worries! So I understand you perfectly. We were afraid of language barrier too, but the clinic provided us with a manager, who spoke English fluently. So you have no reasons to worry about that! Their manager will always be with you and if you have questions, you may ask and you’ll receive clear answers. We really liked, that there was no intrusion from the manager’s side. She was standing a few steps away from us and when we needed her, she was coming to us.


#10

[I]Thank you for the reply Dee! The service there seems really good! You’ve calmed me down. I will tell my husband that we are not supposed to learn Ukrainian) Have you seen other couples there? Did you talk to them? Were there lines? [/I]


#11

There were other couples, from different countries and all of them had their own manager, who spoke their language and translated everything for them. We’ve spoken with a couple from USA, it was their second visit, they’ve came on a planned ultrasound. Actually there was one more reason, which convinced us to sign a contract with the clinic. There were a lot of people there. Not only couples, but also women, who came to do necessary tests for programs of surrogacy and egg donation. Ukrainian women are really very beautiful! And the clinic chooses girls for the programs very carefully. We had been waiting in queues for a couple of hours, but I can’t say that it’s a drawback. Seeing all those pairs only ensured us that it is not a fraud.


#12

[I]Yes, you are absolutely right! These long lines tell a lot about clinic and its success in the activity. How long did it take to your clinic to find a surrogate mother? Did you like the doctors? We really don’t want to waste our time. My husband is not a young boy, he’s almost 60. For some clinics it takes months to find a surrogate mother. [/I]


#13

I understand your worries Gloria. They found a surrogate mother for us in 2 months. It was really fast, we didn’t even expect such rapidity. We thought we will be supposed to wait much more. Their doctors are one of the best specialists in their profession. We’ve heard and read a lot of positive feedbacks about their doctors. They have high rates of successful treatments and fertilization procedures. So we were sure in their professionalism and they really gave us big hope for the best.


#14

Two months? That’s really fast! Were they informing you about the condition of the surrogate mother and the child? Were there problems with registration of the child? I’ve heard about a lot of cases, when there were problems with registration and taking child back to the parent’s country. Sometimes it comes to trial. We really don’t want to start our parenting from courts and litigation.


#15

I’ve also heard about such cases! Thanks BioTexCom and wonderful service, the procedure was easy. We had no problems with documents and registration of our son. The clinic took over registration and certification of all needed documents, including birth certificate and passport for the child to leave the country. Also the clinic provided all information about condition of the surrogate mother and the child. They’d been contacting us one time per month minimum. If you have more questions, please feel free to ask)


#16

Hello Ladies! My wife and I also can’t conceive a baby. So we are looking for way outs. We’ve been thinking about adoption and surrogacy. Adoption is a very good way to fulfill our family. We could make a child happy, give him/her care, which he/she couldn’t receive from their parents. But we also want to continue our line, to have our own baby too. I read carefully all your comments. I think we should try surrogacy first, but we also think to adopt a child later. The main reason to refuse surrogacy was the price in US. But I’ve looked through the prices on the website of the clinic, which Dee was talking about, and I must say they are much lower. Today I will talk with my wife and I think we’ll contact BioTexCom to get more details. Thank you girls, your comments help us a lot! We first thought to go to India, were choosing the right clinic. We know a couple, who went there a couple of years ago. They had been waiting for surrogate mother for a couple of months. Then when that clinic found the woman for surrogacy, they didn’t give any comments about her health, and then our friends got to know that she was overweight. I’m not trying to offend overweight woman, I just want to be sure that our surrogate mother will be healthy and she will be able to carry our child.By the way, Dee, how often was you provided with information about the condition of surrogate mother and the baby?


#17

Hi Dennis! I’m glad my experience helped you to take the decision. Answering to your question, yes, we were provided about the condition of surrogate mother and the baby. At least once per month we were informed with all details by the clinic. They had been in touch with us so we had no worries about our child. Of course it was hard to be in different countries with surrogate mother and our baby! But the clinic ensured us and did everything possible for us to be confident, that everything gonna be fine. I wish you all the best and I hope you will have your own child very soon! And also it’s very generous that you want to adopt a baby. I think that a child will be very lucky to have such parents)


#18

[B]Hello guys! I’ve also had an experience with BioTexCom. My husband and I were trying to conceive a baby for a long time, but all our attempts failed. During medical analysis occurred, that I have PCOS. One year of medical treatment didn’t help. So we started our search for a good clinic in Europe. Our searching lasted really long, but finally we’ve found this clinic. I won’t describe service and everything else, I think all these were told by Dee and I completely agree with her. But if you want to ask something, I’ll answer with pleasure. So, we came to the clinic and our doctor told us everything about donation. In the case of 5 failures, the clinic will refund us our money. I’ve got pregnant from the first attempt. I gave birth to two beautiful kids and now I’m the happiest woman in the world) BioTexCom is really very good clinic, with warm atmosphere and positive influence. I hope it will help you to make a decision. [/B]


#19

[I]Fiona, thank you so much for sharing this info with us! It’s really helpful, I’m glad to see so many positive reviews about BioTexCom. I hope I will join you soon and post my own successful story)

Dee, thank you very much for answering all my questions! I’ve told everything to my husband and we decided to visit Ukraine and give this clinic a look. If we are satisfied with everything, we will sign a contract with them. Yesterday we’ve contacted manager of the clinic, so now we are waiting for their reply. As soon as we get an answer with exact data of meeting with the doctor we’ll buy tickets and fly to Ukraine! We are very excited. I hope that everything will be fine![/I]


#20

Wow so long and useful discussion! Thank you Dee for answers, they helped us to make the final decision. We were choosing between Russian clinic and Ukrainian. That Russian law really concerned us so we decided to stop our search on Ukraine. We’ve sent a letter to the clinic 4 days ago and we’ve already received the answer. Our meeting with the doctor is assigned already. We are nervous! Everything goes so fast) It’s one of the most important decisions in out life. As Dee said, a taxi will meet us in the airport and take us to the clinic. I will tell you later, how the visit will take place)