I will soon face our first anniversary in trying to get pregnant.
I’m surprised I haven’t formed scars on my arms due to all of the needle marks! This has been the a very long process already and can’t even bear to think or wonder how much is too much.
I’m currently being treated by my 3rd reproductive specialist in NYC (New Hope Fertility) and has been the only one who has gotten me to produce any eggs whatsoever.
Doctor #1 from NYLIJ told me she would not be able to tell me I’m infertile only that they could not help me there. (translation: I would effect their wonderful pregnancy stats if I failed)
Doctor #2 Dr Gleicher (NYC-CHR) dropped me after he realized my health insurance REALLY did pay for IVF procedures when faced with a pre-authorization from the insurance company and realized he was not going to be able to get the $15,000 per cycle he wanted in his bottomless pocket.
I feel like I’ve gotten a little closer to something promising but my fluctuating FSH and estradiol levels are puzzling to me. My doctor, Dr Zhang, has his wheels turning all the time and is constantly modifying to see what works best. So far, I have been able to produce 2 eggs in the past 3 months and have had 3 failed IVFs. One IVF had no egg in the foillie :(.
I don’t know what is exactly wrong with me and often wonder if I am just the delaying the inevitable reality. I’m tired of crying, I’m tired of avoiding certain holidays and places in order to avoid break-downs. My tears are useless to me…