No one understands me


My husband and me have been trying for a baby for 5 years we have had 2 IUI’S 2 IVF’s cycles all failed. I did get pregnant for about 2 weeks then had miscarriage. My husband has got 3 children so does not understand me totally - how I yearn for a child of my own and how it hurts to see other people with children and learn of their pregnancies. We were going to adopt but my husband does not want to go down this path because of the non bioligical factor. I just want a child - not really bothered it is not bioligically attached to me. But given the choice I would that like to have a child of mine and his. I feel I cannot talk to anyone about this as it is negative and people do not know how to deal with it - just going on about time about their own tiny problems. I am so angry that no one understands and they say insensitive things I would rather they just talk about it.
We went to see a private consultant and he wants to give us more tests but I do not want to pay for anything else so on nhs waiting list. I hate just waiting and think everyone is so happy with their life and take having children for granted. Life just seems so unfair and cruel but I suppose there must be a reason for it.


Dear Beagle, so sorry to hear your story. Please dont think that you’re alone in this and that nobody understands you - “W-E” understand. Infact this feeling of loneliness is fading away from me ever since I found this forum. I see so many women saying the exact same thing on these forums, that I feel/come across on a daily basis… People’s insensitive remarks, cute babies ALL around us, pregnant bellies and how they effect us… the envy, jealousy, hopelessness, frustation, anger, sorrow… we are all going through the same emotions. Even though I wish we didnt have to be here, yet it helps that we’re in this TOGETHER. Every time I see a newborn at the grocery store and feel that intense desire to have a kid of my own, I KNOW that there’re other women who go through the same experience, and that I’m not the only one going through this torture. So, please dont feel alone… thats what these forums are for: come and write whatever you feel/experience w/o any reservations. You’ll find that many of us here have gone through/are going through the same thing.
May we become mommies SOON!!
hugs and prayers


This forum has been a life saver for me!!! I go to these ladies all the time with problems or questions and they are GREAT to answer and help me!!
I agree…anytime you feel that you need to vent…we are ALL here and nine times out of seven…we have gone through the same thing or emotion.
Take care and I wish you and all these GREAT ladies all kinds of :babydust:


I’m sorry to hear what you’re going through. This forum is full of folks who will understand more than anyone else. Personally speaking, I have found nothing but support from everyone in this community. It is refreshing and comforting to know that even if noone else in my life can understand what I’m going through, I have this community.

As for your circumstances, you are not alone. My DH had a V 20+ years ago. We are still trying to save for IUI / IVF procedures. He’s got 3 grown children from a previous marriage. While I love them dearly, our relationship just isn’t the same. I can certainly understand your yearning…as can everyone else here.

Wishing you hope and peace…


Nice to know there are people out there that understands

Thank you for your reply. I find it a struggle some times just going to work and learning that people are pregnant and feeling jealous as I want to be. I am ill today with sickness and diarriah - Nice!! sometimes I find Christmas stressful as peolple are going to school plays, advent calender. I just feel so angry as just want that chance and people are so insentitive sometimes moaning about their children. I keep praying:pray: :pray:


Thanks for your reply

Thanks for your kind reply. You out of all the replies related to me most with your husband having 3 children. The yearning is more for you than him. I have had 2 IUI;s and 2 IVF’s all self funded that failed. We have to pay as my husband has 3 biological children. I really don’t want to go through it again as it so mentally draining with nothing to show for it at the end. Then I know people who have had it and it has worked 1st time. I hope you can find the money and it works:pray: