The "upsides" of Infertility


#1

This has probably been started somewhere before, but I thought of something today that I wanted to share: an upside to IF. Please, add your “upsides”! Let’s give IF a positive spin for once!!

I realized today that there is an upside to infertility-I don’t have to polish our stainless steel appliances more than once every month or more because I don’t have little finger prints all over them at all times!

Yeah…I’d take little finger prints on my appliances any day over IF.

Wait, make that two upsides…I can work out as hard as I want to as often as I like to without worrying about jiggling a little bean around that I didn’t know about!


#2

Sleeping late on the weekends. Something I very much treasure. :slight_smile:

The ability to hit the road on a last-minute vacation.

The occasional after-work nap.

These are all things I will gladly give up one day, but for now I’ll appreciate them and be lazy every chance I get. :smiley:


#3

Sex with no worries!! Anytime anywhere! Lol no bcp no condoms! :cheer:


#4

I love this idea! I too would give up each of these things in a heart beat but it’s nice to remember the things that I have to be thankful for.

  1. sleeping in
  2. shopping for ME and not feeling quilty
  3. a clean house that stays clean
  4. reading a book undisturbed
  5. a cheap grocery bill
  6. not paying a sitter
  7. not having to find a sitter
  8. driving the car that I want, not the car that is functional
  9. lazy Saturdays!
  10. adult only resorts!
  11. dark circles and bags under my eyes by choice
  12. fend for yourself dinner nights
  13. listening to or watching whatever I want without worrying about little ears.
  14. NO CARTOONS! (Yo Gabba Gabba, specifically!)

#5

This is great I needed this lol.

Sleep and wake whenever I want except for when working.
No having to watch yo gabba or Dora or whatever over any of my non child friendly shows.
I can watch the shows without any distractions or noises.
No having to worry about designing a meal that is child friendly.
No having to make anyone eat their veggies.
Can go on road trips on whim and I loooove road trips.
Never worry about finding a trustworthy babysitter.
No cleaning up after anyone.
I can go out and do whatever on the weekends not that I really go out and party but I could if I wanted to.

I would gladly live wtout these things if it meant I would be a mom but in the mean time Ill try to enjoy the things I get to have and do.


#6

Great idea for a post. - love everyones answers!

I think an upside is having greater compassion now for women in our situation,
being less likely to say stupid inconsiderate things to people trying to get pregnant,

And, when we finally are pregnant we will appreciate every second of that pregnancy and that child in a way women who haven’t struggled may not.

I am luckly to have one child and I appreciate her all the more now I know how hard the second one may be to come by, plus I get to spend lots of one on one time with her while we wait, and that time is a blessing.


#7

Well, I wouldn’t choose infertility over anything…

But I suppose an upside of not being pregnant is going to get a new tattoo tomorrow :slight_smile:


#8

Seeing as all of my friends are currently complaining about their lack of sleep due to their little ones or are taking care of sick babies, I can’t help but laugh and think how “lucky” we are that we get to sleep in and spent all day yesterday cuddling on the couch watching Netflix. It was quiet, we watched whatever we wanted, and we had nice quality couple time.

We’re quickly approaching IVF as being our last option and while I can focus on many negatives and “why me?!”, I can’t help but also think how blessed I am that I’ll get to see my possible baby at conception. We’ll get the first pictures of him/her/them when most couples usually don’t see their baby for another 8-10 weeks from there. I can’t help but think how amazing it’ll be to hopefully show that baby 5, 10, 15 years from now what they looked like at the very first stage of life. There should be no doubt in their mind how much we loved, wanted, and dreamed about them years before they were even conceived. That to me makes us “lucky”.


#9

Thanks for the responses! While everyone was being thankful on Thanksgiving day, I wanted to say “I’m thankful for tampons!”, as I started my period on Thanksgiving!

Yes, we are very lucky, and sometimes I forget that. I’m lucky enough to now be smart enough to stop and think, and not ask someone when they plan to have kids!

Another upside is that I’ve lost all “shame”, if you want to put it that way. I work retail, “big box home improvement store”, as a cashier, and was talking to a male, single co-worker the other day, just shooting the breeze. He asked when we were going to have kids, and without hesitation or even a blush, I very blatantly said, “His swimmers don’t swim so good!!”, with a smile on my face! A year ago I was embarassed to say, “we’re trying”, even before knowing we were having problems, as I figure it’s no one else’s business to begin with. But now, I feel I’m slightly educating others by being so open about our issues. It may embarrass them, but at the very least maybe they’re learning they shouldn’t ask if they don’t really want to know the truth!! :smiley:

I think the best upside for me is that I’ve gained a great friend in a high school classmate. She transferred back to the store she helped me get a part-time position at when I had no job at all, so we see each other at work frequently. After telling everyone on FB that my DH and I are dealing with IF during NIAW, she sent me a private message to tell me she and her husband are struggling, too. We didn’t run in the same circles in h.s., but now we’re in touch on a regular basis, commiserating with each other when AF shows her ugly face, and sympathizing with each other every time there is another pg/birth announcement on FB…which seems to be at least once a week, lately!

And of course, this online community has been a Godsend! :grouphug: