Toddler transitions - need advice please : )


Hi all!

We are thinking about two big toddler transitions right now and I’d love some advice from the experts!

  1. We’re potty training and DD is doing great with peeing, hardly ever has accidents. However, she doesn’t want to poop in the potty, so she’ll hold it to the point where after 4-5 days she won’t eat, complains her tummy hurts, and so we’ve had to give her suppositories to make/help her go. And then we let her go in the diaper: a) because at that point she just needs to get it out, and b) it hurts so bad I don’t want her associating that with the potty. We’ve had her on Benefiber since she was about 1 because she’s always tended toward constipation, so we’ve upped that. And tonight I’m going to start giving her Miralax once daily as well. Any other advice for helping her overcome the poopoo on the potty aversion?

Oh, and it’s not that she’s afraid if it going away because when she finally does go in her diaper she wants to dump it in the potty and flush it…

  1. We’re going to transition DD to a twin bed in the next month or so as we have another coming in June and will need the crib :flower: . I think it’ll be fine - the only problem is she LOVES her crib. She’s 25 mos old and has never tried to get out, will sit in there for 45 minutes or an hour just playing with her stuffed animals or blankets while she’s either waiting to fall asleep or when she’s getting up in the morning. My plan is to take the crib down so she’s not tempted to ask for it, let her pick out bedding and stuff for the big girl bed, and we’re already talking to her about how exciting it will be to get to be in a big girl bed like mommy and daddy are. And we’re going to do it over the holidays because I’ll only be working 2 days out of 11 or so and can just get up and put her back to bed if she keeps getting up. Any pitfalls anyone has experienced that I can avoid? Or suggestions for easy success?

Thanks ladies!


I just wanted to give an opinion about the use of Miralax. When my son was on it, I noticed some disturbing behavioral changes that stopped when I stopped giving it to him. There is some controversy about its use in children. Having said that, I think 2 is still a bit young to potty train. My son was under the care of a urologist for a medical condition. Urologists tend to recommend later potty training. Just wanted to share. Good luck to you!


I am currently ttc #1, but I am a full-time nanny to two beautiful girls (ages 2.5 and 5). I have been with them since the older one was 5 months old.

For potty training with both of them I noticed they both try and find somewhere to hide (like behind the couch) to do #2. I am in the middle of training the little one right now and I basically try to find a pattern in her behavior or even the time of day and I can usually see (or smell, haha) that she is trying to go in her pull-up and I take her straight to the bathroom to the toilet and usually she is already on her way to going so she can’t really hold it in at that point. The older one was on Miralax last year because she had a fissure from constipation. Her parents kept her on it for along time, if I were her parent I would not have. Sometimes too much milk can cause constipation and also getting into winter she was eating a lot less fresh fruit than in the summer so we just upped her fruit and tried to give her lots of healthy yogurt, more juice, less milk. The miralax made her have loose diarrhea - which is kinda impossible (although it would be cleaner) to potty train with for a 2 year old.

They were both transitioned into big girl beds by their 2nd birthdays. The older girl was a lot tougher - she wanted me to sleep with her (they know you can now fit in their bed with them!) and she would get up and take her clothes off (including messing diapers and smear them everywhere!) and mess up her room. The second child has been a breeze. She goes to sleep routinely everyday and she does the same thing she did when she was in her crib, she plays with her toys and books in her bed and doesn’t tear up the room at all. With the rail on, it almost is like a mini crib, her own private space. I think picking out the bedding is exciting for her but keeping her other elements and bedtime routine will be very important.

One thing I did learn, if she hasn’t gone #2 yet for the day, she takes her naps in backwards footie pajamas (with the feet cut off)! They are my insurance in case she tries to take off a messy diaper by herself during naptime - anything I can do to to prevent having to clean crap off all the dresser and all the walls!!!

Since you probably have a monitor anyway another tip is to put on a child door-handle lock on the inside of the door. They will inevitably get out of their bed and try to open the door and come out. This way they know its naptime and the bed is where they will be. I have opened the door to find them both sleeping on the ground before but for the most part if they get out of their bed to play or grab books, they crawl right back in to sleep =)


Thank you both for your advice! We actually had a little bit of a breakthrough last night - Rachel had to poop and told us and tried to go on the potty twice before we finally gave in and went to the diaper. And believe me, we’re not pushing her at all to train. About two weeks ago she started getting up in the morning and geting mad if we tried to put her in a diaper. She went right to her panty drawer and picked her pair out for the day. She moved up to the 2 yo classroom in daycare so I think seeing all the other kids using the potty really gave her incentive to be like them. Anyway, my hope is that once we get her stools soft again she’ll learn it doesn’t hurt to go and then the potty won’t be such a big deal. The diet is definitely an issue - she eats apples and bananas and she’ll eat baby food fruit in the morning, but of course bananas are constipating. We add fiber to the milk we give her at home (about 6 oz per day) and she gets about 6 oz more at daycare. We also add fiber to her yogurt, cereal, anything that’s at all liquidy. She rarely gets cheese either becuase of the stools. The only thing we haven’t done is juice, only because we’ve been tryng to hard to avoid it so far I’d hate to push it on her now…

Good idea about the bedroom lock - especially if she’s like the girls you take care of who get back in their beds once they realize it’s time! And I’d heard about the backwards footie pajamas but had forgotten - thanks for reminding me! So far putting a onesie on under her jammies has worked because she can’t unsnap it yet, but soon I’m sure she’ll figure that out :woohoo: And I hadn’t thought about the fact that reading to her in her bed instead of the chair we now use (which was one change I’d thought to make) might backfire because she might figure out we can sleep with her - good warning…

Eternallyhis: Good luck on this cycle! :pray::bsv: :bsv:


Heather- I can’t offer advice on the poo issue, as DS is actually wuite the opposite and tries to poop every time, and will sometimes get upset when he can’t make it happen. Now that he’s been out of diapers for a few weeks, he’s getting better about it, but he’s still a little too obsessed with making sure he poos.

As far as the crib issue, my DS was the same way your DD was. He could happily sit in the crib for a long time after he got up, or even before he went to sleep if he wasn’t ready for a nap. I was worried that the transition would be hard, but then, right before he turned 28 months old, the week of Thanksgiving, he decided he was going to start getting out of his crib as soon as he woke up. He’s now forced us to transition him, since he basically let us know he was ready. Maybe give your DD a few more weeks/months and she may surprise you like my DS did.